The Darkness within..

The end of 2011

2011-12-31T14:28:00.001+08:00

Well, today marks the end of 2011. We'll all be kissing the blessed or rotten(for some) year good bye and celebrating the coming of 2012 in hopes that it will be as awesome as the last.

I'm kind of feeling the same way I always felt at the end of the year. Like a fusion of happy and sad kind of emotion? Honestly I'm not exactly used to this feeling yet though this is what I feel every year. Kind of makes me uneasy and all queasy.. Maybe it's just knowing that 2012 is a new year and yes, it's the future and yes, the unknown.

2011 has been nothing less than a helluva rollercoaster ride for me. In this year I've been to the lowest point of my life to right now, the peak. :) I really couldnt ask for more. I've been through enough heartbreaks to last me a lifetime though. Actually, not many. Its just 3 in a span of one year? Fell,
Climb back up. Fell, climb back up.. The cycle. HAHAHA. :) I've been through enough drama. Ive met a handful of really wonderful people that I am really thankful of. Personally, it's been an enjoyable year. Reflecting back, I've done a lot. Extremes of both good and bad and I'm not even regretting any. Not even the bad, really.. :) I've found plenty answers to my own questions. Most importantly I guess I've grown considerably. And that I have learnt quite abit of myself. I'm more aware of my flaws now more than anything else..

Change? NAHHHH.. We'll see. Pretty much tested and proven. Try to change and be someone I totally am not is too draining. Got me pretty unhappy.. Hence, i believe a lot more in "a leopard can't change it's spots" now.. Can't change but tone down, yes. :) grow up, yes.

At the end of the day, if you can't handle me.. Then I guess I don't need you, do I? Like they say "If they cant handle You at your worst, they sure as hell dont deserve you at your best." if you can't accept me, then it's just too bad. Everyone has flaws.

In this year, I've played many roles.
In fact, too many. And to what measures? To me, I feel like I've been to extremes. I've been the ultimate nice person. Which is something I do not usually project to others. I've cared enough, I've been there, I've sacrificed, I've given. I now know how it feels like, what kind of reaction this action draws from others. On the other hand, I've been the biggest bitch.
I've toyed, ive manipulated and I've
Betrayed.. I've been the worst I've ever been and probably ever will be..

So in a nutshell, 2011 taught me many many things. Most of which are life lessons.. :) it's also the year that I've done plenty crazy things. Too crazy! I've partied so hard that people I do not know, knows my name in rebel. I've drank so much that I cudnt live a week without alcohol. I did a lot of impulsive things and i chased cheap thrills.. I fell for a really wonderful girl.. I pierced my tongue. I........ Okay.. The list stops here. But you get my drift.

So, personally.. 2011 isn't that rotten to me. Since I can find plenty good in it. But then, for the family.. I shall not say its a good year.. Dad suffered a fit that scared the living crap out of me and that was the last time I ever want to witness that. It happened in Sarawak and I cried like the biggest loser. Couldnt contain my emotions at all..

After crying the entire night that night.. That was when I knew, no heartbreaks will ever break me completely.. Even if it did, I shouldnt let it break me.. That's also when I knew, that I can take any possible heartbreaks coming my way.. Therefore, I fear nothing.. Will still embrace love and I still believe love always wins.. :) call me silly, call me naive. Doesn't matter.

I do not know what to ask for 2012. But more time to do what I need to do, to spend time with those I love. To live everyday like its my last.. I ask for my wisdom to know what to do and which direction to head. I do not want to ups and downs much but then it's hard to say cos that's when I learn the most..

For 2012. I hope whatever it brings, the ones I love will find their happiness. Not happiness brought by having someone in their lives.. But being happy on their very own.. And I want this peace in me to last.. Also the family to remain healthy. :)

So much more to write but I'm so tired now.. Nights world.

New years eve. 2011

2011-12-31T08:03:00.001+08:00

The time for reflections and what nots. Will do so later at work and blog laters. :) need to end off my chapters on onsugar as well before I make a comeback to blogspot.. :)

So laters!

The need to express

2011-09-28T01:43:00.000+08:00

-- contained.so much i need to spill, don't know where to start. therefore it shall stay this way.My life needs a change. and I'm working on it. :) Come october. life's nothing but a huge ass mess right now. :)

All the way down low

2011-08-30T13:55:00.000+08:00

I guess its time i come to my senses. time to go, time to go.. how long am i going to let myself feel like that? many asked me this question already, no? My answer have always been the same "well, i dont know..". I guess i havent been giving it much thought. Its either that, or that i have been thinking too much. :) tsk..And then i think back on all the advices ive given people, all the quotes, all my beliefs and my own sayings.. i realize i dont practice what i preach. well, at least not anymore. and why? i wonder. why? whats there for me to hold on to anyway? Nothing.. Another question frequently asked "Why put yourself through such misery?" and i answer the same shit "idk." previously, the many times i waited.. the SNAP came early to save me. now, i feel the snap coming but i am denying it. and WHY!? fuck my life. i dont understand. so i thought about it. flipping it over and over in my mind. then i realized this fear. im not naming it here for everyone to know. but theres this one fear and i am still not ready to face it. not yet. but maybe soon. :)I am not as strong as everyone think me to be. myself included. its pretty disappointing tho.And then i wonder.. whatever happened to the old me? the confident, strong, independent me. the one who needed no one. who needed no close bonds. who was perfectly fine or even better off being alone. whatever happened to that? at times, i still feel that way though. but its not as much as before.. and it surprise me somehow that i allowed myself to change. :) so much. this much.. changes are good. this change is good.i'll just need to learn to get back up. bounce. i needa bounce back up. Right now, i feel numb. once in awhile i feel empty to my soul. i dont know. hollow. so empty i can cry but only for abit before i subconsciously keep my emotions in check again. They tell me i need to cry. i need to cry so hard and so bad till i cant cry anymore. but i cant do it. even if i let myself, its just a few tears before i stop. i just cant. and this is killing me softly. well, maybe i havent reach breaking point yet. and when i do, i believe thats when i let my world crumble for a bit. honestly i am looking forward to building my world back up but i am not sure about letting it crumble. about letting my guards down and my walls down. This days. although much have happened. ive laughed ive smiled ive socialized.. ive done things that usually would have made my day. Usually, meeting friends and seeing new people makes my day. i love meeting new people. nowadays, i just feel like im putting on my mask once again. Back to square one, 3 yrs ago. i laugh but the laughter dont reach my eyes. and all the smiles, tho i tried.. were just empty smiles. pretense. i seem to have excelled in it ever since 3 yrs ago no? and this is the one thing about all my traits that i have a lovehate relationship with. i dont know if i liked it or not. good and bad good and bad. sigh! i remember blogging about this many years back and now, many years later, im blogging about it again. tsk. what am i to do with myself? :)see how things goes. see, i am okay. people, quit worrying.<3

Here's WHY, to those close to my heart.

2011-08-25T02:04:00.000+08:00

I know I've screwed up. I've been doing it almost flawlessly these days huh? i guess i owe you all the truth, the reason why i got so detached, why i don't feel like meeting up. why I'm so different all over again. so here's why.I've been so high up only to be thrown back down over and over. In the past months, I've cried till i thought my eyes would bleed, I've laughed till i almost died, I've felt so lost i almost went crazy, so helpless i hated myself, so jealous(yeah for the first time), so insecure, so annoyed, so angry, so empty, so excited, so alone, so everything. good and bad, all and all.. i have experienced every emotion humanly possible in a span of a few months. champion, no? :)Fortunately, i am still surviving. I've learnt so much. and because of all these, i feel myself trying to detach myself from my friends again. to go away for abit. to feel myself again.. :) to feel unbreakable.Ive done some really impulsive things. things that wouldn't please my friends very much. Just because I wasn't able to handle my emotions properly, I've hurt and angered some really close to my heart. I've missed Freddie's birthday bash though not deliberate. but i was too caught up with my emotions to remember such stuff. Ive broken my promise to go USS together with baby girl jessie. Ive neglected so many. Then again, i was forgiven even before i can apologize. saying they know me for me, they know apologizing is hard for me. knowing me so well, understanding me and really worrying for me. Sometimes, i think i don't deserve people treating me like this. i don't know what i did to have such smacking awesome people in my life. i can easily name many now. people whom i know will stand by me no matter what and will try to shelter me from the world. I am not perfect and i am not awesome, yet they love me for me. although at times i can be the biggest bitch, it doesn't affect them, they're still there. :) although i do not show it often enough and i know you all know that i have problems expressing appreciations.. do know that I am aware of all the things you all have done for me. all the shits I've put you all through. i am thankful to have you all in my life, really. i don't know what i'll do without you. :) and i know u all believe that i do not need anyone, thanks. i am strong but not invincible. so, i do need you all. :) i know i do. i need you all to know that you all don't have to worry about me. really. i dont like you all worrying about me, fussing over me. i'll be okay. you all really need to stop spoiling me rotten! :) I'm always having my ways with all of you. tsk! anyway i know many of you are probably against the idea of me doing what i am doing. maybe not against, but just think I'm pretty stupid? well, remember that this was what you all did before. for you all, it was a lesson learnt. for me, its new. I've never been here in this situation. i'll never know and i'll never learn if i don't try. and i'll still be that arrogant, snobbish, overconfident bitch that intimidates many. i know my chances and i know what I'm risking. i mean, whats the worst that can happen? i'll get knocked down face flat in mud again, along with my ego and my pride. so? i'll just have to suck it up and get back up, no? :) and when i do, i walk away with new insights. its not like I'm going back to an old relationship that turned bad or something. so you can't really call me stupid.. LOLS. anyways, every bad experience is a lesson learn. i am not asking you all to accept what i do. but I'm just reasoning it out. :) I've already come this far, theres nothing much left for me to lose. this is just what i feel and how i think and my reasons why. i wanna say THANK YOU! For worrying about me constantly but yet trying so hard to look like every things fine, trying not to ask me because you all know thats what i want. Thanks for trying to protect me from the world. for always being there. for forgiving me for all my wrongs and for all the things i am supposed to do but failed. most of all, thank you for accepting me the way i am, understanding me and how i deal with my shit. thank you for loving me even though i am far from perfect.Sorry, for not being good enough and not being awesome. sorry i always screw things up when i get too caught up with emotions. :))Do know that i love y'all very very much. <3 and and very thankful to have you all. i might not be there to have fun with y'all, but when y'all are down and out, i'll fly down really. Renny, Kok, jun, Apple, Jessie, Theo, Ryan, Gay, Aud, Char, Jar, Ryd, and moreeeeeeeeee. <3

Paramore <3

2011-08-22T04:49:00.000+08:00

I was at Paramore's concert last night. and man, they were AWESOME! :) Hayley was smokin' hot. The crowd was a bitch though. we were in the mosspit and yea, theres these really rowdy bunch of dumbass-think-theyre-really-cool mattreps trying to be clowns of the clowns really. And surprisingly, the crowd was pretty nerdy. What the fuck happened to all the kick ass punk rock jamming crazy kinda people? :\ well, i guess thats the thing about going mainstream, your songs just suddenly appeal to all kinds of people and all kinds of age. tsk!i had my fair share of fun and screamed till my throat gave way. Jumped like mad, pushed, screamed, headbanged, you name it, we did it. :) Paramore is still awesome. i remember the first song i listened to was - My heart. and i loved them since then. :)) wow. Anyway i really gotta thank Kyte(Amelia) for bringing me there la. and helping me with queue cutting. HAHAHA! I met two really awesome people as well, Lina and Ching. Practically went crazy with me. :)) it was a mad night. mad awesome night.. :) Thank youuuuu.

Too much.

2011-08-04T01:29:00.000+08:00

ive got so much on my mind right now. so much. well, i guess my life took another turn. triggering all sorts of funny random out of the blue thoughts. all the theories in life, all the experience ive gained and the shit ive been through. all the things i thought i knew. ya, well.. im starting to question them now. all my achievements, were they really mine? all the decisions i made, were they really right? every freaking thing. my minds on overdrive. were my failures solely my fault? was i really not blame for all the hurt i put them through? am i really that awesome to have made a change in peoples life? or am i just another average jane? did i make a difference? did i do right? did i do well? or did i fail without knowing so. all the things i believed in, how much truth were in them? are they even true at all? am i really as strong as everyone thinks me to be? am i as strong as i believed i am? its a never ending list. came to the conclusion that, its the same. it only depends on how you want to look at it. how you want others to see it. For in every lie, theres a little bit of truth. For every wrong, there is right. For every good, there is bad. For every black, there is white. so when i think of all these, i realize that ive always thought i did right. decisions, beliefs, things i did, reasons, everything.. ive always tried to think whats right. whats fair. whats good. How naive and silly.. LOL. well, i guess that comes with confidence. the more confident, the more certain, the more you believe in what you think and feel and do. Now, right or wrong doesnt matter anymore. because no matter what decisions one thinks right, would be wrong to the other. all the things i did previously, thinking its for the best, thinking its right.. but to look at it from the other party's view, its no doubt, wrong.Im not being negative here. so if any of you are starting to worry for me, its not necessary. :)) im just reflecting. and my mind is racing nonstop on random thoughts. When i see my friends and listen to their heart felts. theres just so many different emotions and scenarios.. Dissatisfaction, anger, frustration, selfishness, selflessness, love, hate, sadness, guilt, hopelessness, etc. i just dont know what to say to them for i know what theyre going through. especially when you know what they want to hear yet you cannot say it to them because you know that that is not the truth. there is really so much so much i want to say, i just dont know where to start and how to continue. theres so many things i dont understand. so many questions in my head. honestly, i dont feel the most happy but i am surviving. im not sad, not angry, not disappointed.. maybe just puzzled. looking back, was i really happy? was it enough that i can not give two hoots to the world and what they think? i dont remember? maybe i was really happy, and i didnt even realise it. could that even be possible? or have i just been chasing temporary highs? maybe i am just pretty messed up inside without myself knowing. wtf, i am confusing myself. and when i was at my happiest.. is there a limit? can i experience happiness beyond that? and not forgetting times i thought i would die. times when i cried so hard for the many months, fell into depression and was a real mess. times when i crashed face down. will there be times i get more broken than i was? or will i slowly get use to it, and it wouldnt hurt that much anymore? immune? How come i dont learn even after all these tears, heartaches and scars. why is it that im still not afraid of loving? how can i still have faith in love? HOW COME I STILL BELIEVE LOVE ALWAYS WINS? god, i must be the most retarded person alive. but i guess, id rather have faith in it than not at all. :)i really wonder, how i made it this far. really..what do people mean when they say "tomorrow will be a better day"? as in, what do they really think when they say that? or was it just something people say to make someone else feel better knowing absolutely well, it doesnt change anything. "Everything will be fine" - Really? like how'd you know? i used to feel like that, think like that. thats why i absolutely hate it when i had to confide in people and they keep reciting the same thing to me. when you're down and flat, everything everyone else says to you just seem wrong. and i apologise to those i was mean to just because you were trying to make me feel better but i didnt wanna listen. :D i am stubborn like that.And now i wonder, when people say that to me. what were they thinking? why do you think it will be alright? whats your reason behind saying those? or is even a reason? because when i say it i really believe in every single alphabet.. like everythings gonna be fine. it might not turn out the way you want it to be. but ultimately, at the end of the day.. you're just gonna be fine. its a survivor thing i guess? that made me what i am today i guess. everythings gonna be fine. i dont have to worry my silly head too much about a lot of things cos in the end, i will be able to cope. i will find a way. if things dont work out, theres always another solution. if theres no other solution, then you gotta change the problem. and adapt. and things will be fine all over again. see the problem? i suppose i am too certain of myself. i realized this days when i experience freaking insecurities for the fucking first time of my life.. that it was because of my confidence, it was because i believed too much in myself that i almost died of negativity. the confusion is this..you would say that if i am confident and certain of myself, i should NOT have ANY insecurities. which was how i was previously? and almost cried thinking i am less confident now, less certain, that i have changed into someone smaller, someone lesser than strong, someone vulnerable, someone whose scared of everything.. Thats true to a certain extend. lets look at another point of view now. when one has always been so confident and so sure of herself. when one has always counted on her own instincts and worked on her own beliefs.. not letting others influence her. how can she not be certain? how can she not believe her feelings? how to when shes always proven herself right? ... One day something struck her and she started looking at all the different scenarios.. turns a little negative. with time, she'd be very negative thinking, no? because she's always counted on herself despite what others may have to say. because shes very certain of her instincts n thinking, no?so i guess i now know why at one point of time, when i am feeling negative, i go all the way down low.. panicked because i sensed the change and not wanting to lose myself, slowly made my way up again. everything happens for a reason. its just a matter of time. :) i have always believed in this.. there is not reason for this post at all. no meanings. its just me and my random thoughts. theres just so much more to learn in life. i just need to be more aware. :)) i just feel pretty alone now.

Low laying days

2011-06-16T16:51:00.000+08:00

Ive been like this for a few weeks now i suppose? like all i wanna do is just lay LOW. I dont feel like heading to town, no mood to bring the party ons, no wish to meet up with random people. weirdly, i am perfectly fine with staying in the entire day just lazing around the house. :)Anyway, the past few days have been nothing but chilling and more chilling. :) and i am enjoying every single moment of it. Theres this day eunice came over to my place and spent the entire afternoon/evening watching big bangs and all with me till like 1am? i didnt even feel like i wasted a day at home! like normally, i'd get frustrated and all, but then it didnt happen. :) but of course, we had balls of fun. Theres this other day when theo called and demanded dinner or meetup giving an excuse saying its our holidays and all. :) knowing he isnt feeling too awesome, i called on warren and brought eunice with me. Head all the way down to East Coast Park to chill and talk. Dropped Theo off and 3 of us went to KAMPONG PARK(this little garden like area near warrens place) and share ghost stories till all 3 of us got scared. HAHAHAHA! =)Another day when one of the breads wasnt feeling right. so they brought me to Canopy at bishan park 1. Where we can drink smoke and talk. :) Was like a heart to heart talk session between all of us. Purely htht and chilling.. it felt like a night well spent. usually i wouldnt feel that way, but i dont know why these days.. i just am happy laying really low. :\Yesterday was just WORK. 2-10. and Eunice had 2 tuition in a row and dinner plans right after tuition. So i didnt really get to whatzapp her much yesterday. felt weird really. but she came to surprise me after work. I WAS ECSTATIC! :) mad happy to see her kind? she came to see me for abit and then sent me home. AND TODAY! will be dinner with eunice and her friends yk and rox. :) laterrrrrrs~

Wonder.

2011-06-01T03:16:00.000+08:00

And if you ask me, I'd say with a smile.."darlings, I'm happy now. :)":) I no longer feel the emptiness. No longer doubting myself. No longer thinking I'm probably going crazy with all that blank emotions.They just, don't seem to matter anymore. I'm just happy. With each passing day, things just keeps getting better for me.Soon I'll have my life back, up and running.My life back in order. :)Give me sometime, I'll get there. No longer an emotional wreck. :)) Don't have to worry for me for the time being really.It's a gamble. Love always wins anyway. Keep telling myself that.I need to rant: ICA's A MOTHER BITCH! Daaaaaaamn Love,Tiffy

Findin' the comfort zone

2011-05-02T13:20:00.000+08:00

These long weekend (Sat,Sun and Labour day) i've spent much time on my own.Thinking, reminiscing and reflecting..trying to get to the root of all this blank emotions.still, i dont get much of it.but what i've figured out was that previously, i have too little time. in fact, almost NO time at all for anything..Weekends were all burnt at the Estee lauder counter at work.weekdays were all school, and after school it would be meeting the boyf for dinner with his fam or just cuddling infront of the television and sorts.And that had been my life for like the last 1year and 6 months at least. Right before that was 24/7 work,school and girlfriends because i was so down i think i almost was suicidal(ok, joking..)Then i had Raul before i left him, and before raul it was the other xboyf..who also took up almost every minute of my life back then. --"That life with the xbf was at least 3 years.i guess i was a failure at balancing my time. LOLS. but cmon!when you're in a stable r/s, thats what you do what! no meh?meet up hang out, crash their place and sorts..but the thing was all my r/s was pretty controlling.. i wasnt allowed to do this, that and this and that..so everything was pretty much mundane. and i had no time at all.not much time for myself, my friends or my family.but NOW!NOW, its fking crazy.i am unemployed which alone means tooooooooo much time on my own.and i am single. which really brings "too much time" to whole new dimension.i reckon i am just not used to it.thus feeling the way i feel every now and then. i guess its just me tryna seek my comfort zone. back to what things were like before and all.Because thats what my life was like, since forever! *grumbles.So ive decided, screw all these nonsense to hell and back!i'm gonna have to slowly find my bearings and work towards it.First, i gotta start working again. Then i'll start gyming back at Great world city.at the same time, get all my priorities right.studies first no matter what. parties are for weekends only.and the list just goes on..With this, im pretty darn sure that i'll be fine in the time to come.maybe occasional breakdowns when the emptiness starts eating at me and all.but then i should be fine. :) no one dies of emptiness. (shall keep telling myself that)hahaha! its just a life too unfamiliar to me.i will get use to this. :) i WILL!

Hello familiarity! :)

2011-04-27T00:26:00.000+08:00

So its back to school now and i am so done with my IPP(in short, attachment).Not that i hated my attachment or workplace, infact i actually loved being there.its just i dont like to commit my time there for too long. 11-7 everyday for 2 months was slowly killing me. Didnt have much time to go out, and when i did, i dont have enough time to rest and be ready for the next day.was suffering from severe lack of sleep.Weekends was the usuals, party with the boys or doing something healthy or anything with them la.Usually its one saturday's energy drained and then i had to rest on sunday.And the cycle repeats itself, monday, tuesday.. etc, etc.It was pretty bad, i ended up with major major breakouts and everyone knows i hardly have zits.screwed up my period cycle big time and all. got moody and grouchy all the time. :)thank god, i am so done with ipp. now that i havent been there for 6 days, i am kind of missing my colleagues. :)hahahaha! After all that lunch and all together, i miss them nao!im going back for part time tho, wait for me people! im coming back. :DSchool's been awesomely mundane! Been going through the usual rituals of a new semester.know, get to know the repeat students if any, gossip about holidays(which for this case is IPP since we din have hols), catching up, queuing 10 years to get our new books from the print shop and all. not to mention having panic attacks when drawing lots for random groupings for different modules. :) I didnt realize i actually missed all this. This two days been great. i mingled with my classmates to catch up and all during lessons also. not something i do very often. was not seated with the usual clique. i guess changes are good. hahaha. i actually have to cos i cant sit at the back anymore. without my specs, i really cant see shit. had to sit in the middle even during lecture, not that i was listening la. :) i tried! Having theo beside me during lecture is the best, seriously. i cannot even do my usual ear-in-ear-out because he was talking to me nonstop. LOLS.oh well! then lecture with susheelan and all was forever tapping out cards and going out for tea, lunch, latelunch, prelunch or post lunch makan. LOLS! :)i miss this shit. school. i guess career will really have to come a little later for me for up till now, i have no clue what i want to do.i for sure as hell would not want to be working in the banks.so yup, still searching, still looking for my direction.for now, study first, enjoy being a student and absorb as much self development lessons as possible.its still during school that we learn all this life lessons and character development. :DNIGHTS ALL.8 am lesson tomorrow. :)fml x infinity!

Broken.

2011-04-13T03:52:00.000+08:00

No idea where these feelin's are coming from.No idea what these emotions are..No idea what triggered them..All I know is, it leaves me feeling kinda.. Broken.I guess I've did it again.. The same mistake over and over.. And over again..Always controlling the damned emotions. Always denying myself the right to cry, to feel sad, to feel vulnerable.. Breakable.over time it accumulates and snap every once in awhile.. So much so I dont even know what I am feeling anymore..I hate this..I'm an emotional wreck now.,Theres absolutely no reason at all, for my tears to fall.And tonight, they crash around me..I really cant figure this whole thing out.I refuse to let myself crumble.. But tonight, I'm letting go of my control..And cry myself to sleep.I feel so.. Hollow...And why?..

Rattled.

2011-04-04T08:20:00.000+08:00

Wanted to blog bout all the random events that happened lately. Too bad I got rattled really bad last night. So, the random events will not be touched on in this entry.It was a pretty awesome way to end off a week. Know, a good Saturday night out, a long Sunday's rest and then dinner with the most awesome family members at uncle ringo's. After that was home playing a joke on Theo which got me and Jessie laughing nonstop and then there was my first attempt to skype via iPhone. All was good until I receive this text from an ex that really really ruffled my feathers. It's really damn shocking. How people change. Faster than me, more extreme than me. it's not the competition that pisses me. It's the choice of words that was used. It looked rude, felt rude and meant a lot more than just how it appears to be.There's a reason behind everything. Would I want to know?I used to be someone who wants to get to the root of the damn problem and understand how why and what the other party is feeling. Be it a friend, my Boyf, an ex, someone close to me or whatever. Its the same anyway.I'll try to fking get why I'm given this treatment..But now, it just doesnt matter.One time.. Two times.. This is the like what? 3rd time I'm treated rudely. Its either you are underestimating me or you are overestimating yourself.Underestimate me all you want, for I dont care what you think ABT me anymore.So, no. I don't want to know the reasons behind this.Because it doesn't change anything. I'm on great talking terms with all my xbfs. I don't mind having exceptions. If you cant find it In you to be an awesome friend and accept that im just trying to be a good friend then that's just too fking bad.So get this facts right, I'm just trying to be nice. What's the pt of two person knowing each other inside out alr then when things don't go well, They just end up nt talking to each other.Maybe I'm just too stupid to be caring for an ex.But I still feel, friends are way better than nothing at all.So please stop underestimating me. Ive moved on already.Moved on long ago. It's just that I still care and have this soft spot for you. The same as what I have with all those close to me now.I'm single doesn't mean I want to be attached. When you dont see a boy constantly by me, doesn't mean I don't have one in heart. When you see me always alone and still chatting you up occasionally, doesn't mean I have not get over you. So please. Stop underestimating my willpower and determination. U've been long gone from being the one in my heart. :)get them facts right.i care only because you used to be the one and that ive known you so much. because you used to be close. because you are as special a friend to me as everyone else whom i am close with.get them facts into your head right now.things would have been different if we ended badly, which we did not.or if you were an ass to me during the rs, which you were not also.all we had was genuine. so, just accept it.im over you. im good with being friends. :)take it or leave it. your call.Damn. I feel better nao. Sheesh.What a way to end my week. This week will be better.It have GOT TO BE better.. Keep telling myself that.It's times like this I wish to meet the boys & that u are here.Shit..I'm depending too much on them already. too fast and too much..

Addiction

2011-02-26T15:17:00.000+08:00

Okay, theres like so much to update yet again ever since the last post.

in fact, on the very night i posted that post, i made out with one of the boys. LOLS.

i wouldnt deny that theres a bit of attraction there. but i really dont want to look too closely into it. :) These days ive made really a bit of friends. Daniel goh is one of them. Friend of edrick and zane. he's comical. then theres people i got to know from attachment. :)

Attachment is beyond awesome really. the people there are wonderful. the bosses friendly and open. i can be myself at the office, dont have to act like some meek timid stupid intern. But i was thrown a challenge yesterday by one of the recruiting managers. He wants me to get my license to be an official and full fledge financial consultant. it will be sponsored by the company. i have to pass 3 papers in the span of 2 months. in which i am confident. but im just kinda scared.. :) Another challenge is to be attached to the better financial consultants to their appointments and meetings. to view and observe how they do it, how they present how they close deals. I accepted both. :) So i'll be pretty darn busy again next week. i really like the environment there. :)

Met daniel and theo and all tep boys that day to have dinner at TGIF. alls good. everyones good at work. no ones bullied and all so im pretty glad. :)

On the night i made out with this guy at rebel. Nick called me at 5am. fetched me from spize and sent me home. Chilled abit below my block and talked and catch up. the familiarity shocked me. it doesnt hurt anymore, to see him to talk to everything.. its like im really over him until when he sent me to the stairway and said 'is there any chance of us being together again'. i got so shocked i didnt know what to say. i mean i really expected this but i wasnt counting on it anymore because ive moved. so i told him i dont know what the future might bring but we should just stay the way we are now.

and he respected that. but now he seems like its fading again. :) thank god i didnt go back. it would have been really stupid on my part. but i dont blame him. :) We're still friends.

TONIGHT! im going to party again. with jessie. i dont know if candra and the boys are going. i know daniel will be. i know ryan will be at PH, Mich will prolly be at zouk. :) saturday nights.. sigh! this will be my last before i take a long 2 -4 weeks break. :)

i miss that boy. mannn! not nick. :)

so much have came and gone.. SUPER LONG POST.

2011-02-12T16:46:00.000+08:00

its been so long since i last blogged. :) i mean the last post before my world start crumbling. But really you cant blame me for not blogging that 4days that i kept crying because i wasnt even at home like101% of the time. i needed to be really tired to be able to sleep, and i attended MORNING LECTURES everyday without fail okay.

Okay, since i am so free this saturday afternoon. Theres the agenda for todays post..

My failed relationship (iknowright, what a title) and i know many is wondering wtf went wrong.
Exams are over and done with
Some random events that took place
Chinese new year.
RANDOM updates.

I have a feeling that this post is going to be uber long. so, enjoy. :D

1. Failed R/S

Okay, so i mentioned that i attended all morning lessons.so much so that even the boys in my class are appalled. hahaha! and were secretly worrying for me. which can be really sweet lah. yups. Everyone was watching for signs that i would break down. :) but thats all over naoooo.

i am done with crying. done with wanting him back. done with thinking its all my fault and that maybe i am not good enough.

seriously, i dont know what the fk was going through my mind really. ive been pretty awesome in this rs already, i personally feel. other than me getting cranky when i have nothing to do at his place and him never understanding me, i think im good. apart from being demanding and domineering. hahahaha! =D In this relationship i did not stray. not once. ive been faithful and loyal. i guess ive grown up somewhere along the r/s with him. :)

where can you find a girl whose willing to bash into the jungle with all the mosquitos and mud and dirt with you to get your fishing fix? haha! or prawning. or sit at kyoto fish pond for hours just so the boyf can fish? huh! where can you find you tell me! where can you find a girl who fights with your mom headon even before you all are together and then clique well after that? or a girl whose willing to run 4km with you. or a girl whose willing to run 4km alone when youre too lazy to run. the list just goes on.. i can think of many funny things really. :)

There was me in denial for 4days. kept thinking he's going through what i have gone through two years ago. then i realised, im going crazy. Instincts told me there was someone else but he denied it and i believed him. call me stupid la, but i was the one who was together with him, not you. so you wouldnt know, really. :)

well, but after all these and im over him nao, we did talk. and it was true, there was no third party in our rs, he did not cheat on me BUT.. there was this jobok girl like 1 week after we broke up and they broke up like 1 week after getting together also. sooooo! i think nearing the end of our relationship, he probably started developing feelings for this girl which only lasted like 1 week after he's got her. lols! the best part is the girl la, really. thats the best part. hahahaha.

mmms, hes back to his normal self before we got together. the player. sigh! anyways! i still dont really like it when people start pushing blames to him and calling him names la. i mean, i know you all care for me, i know you all mean well. but it really takes two hands to clap. a relationship cannot fail because of just one person, can it? He cant be called bastard what, like he didnt treat me like shit afterall. In our relationship, i was treated well and all. not like he neglected me or any of my needs. he's pretty awesome in the r/s also apart from his possessiveness and temper. Its not like he toyed with me for a year, the feelings were genuine. so i dont feel that i should be angry. but i feel DAMN GLAD, that i am not treated like the 1week girl. :) theres a difference.

And so the actual reason to why our rs failed and i got ditched was.. *Drum rolls*

Feelings faded.

I know right. what a reason to end a relationship really. damn cliche, damn old school. hahaha! but its what he said la ok? he mentioned we wanted different things in the r/s, which dont really make sense to me. he said feelings faded since damn long ago, but i dont think so also, considering the way he treated me like long ago. i believe feelings can be gone if you will your heart and mind to, it can just go away with a snap of your fingers. so i accepted the reason. we broke up over a half fucked phone call really. but he man-ed up to meet me the next day to tell me in person, in which i respect and appreciate v v much. he still cannot stand the sight of my tears then la. =) i cried like a pussy in his arms i swear.

and then there was the bok girl calling him b publicly in fb and all. i soon got the picture that hes got her. cried until my eyes turn yellow. after knowing her character and what she was like in NP before gg sim, i cried until my eyes felt like they were about to drop outta its socket. few days later, i slowly came to accept it. The second time she openly B-ed him on fb, was the day i stopped crying. i remembered..

I was seated at starbucks Bukit panjang Plaza. Alone waiting for R who was so damn late and Nic&Amanda. i saw the fb post and i was like 'okay.. smooth move, tiff. smooth move..' sighed and let out a breath of relieve or something like that. like as if that confirms everything and all. the feeling was ' okay tiff, thats it..'. Then when all of them arrived, Nic told me something bout dongli and all.. i was like 'SUI LA, pang kang alr. fk you and this love.' and went to party with the group and some boys.

How i moved on? i thought to myself that he's no longer the boy i love anymore. hes not the same boy. the boy whose damn zai. someone whose character and personality is as strong and stubborn as mine. someone who doesnt hide and dont care about what others think or do or feel about him. the confident boy. gone.. thats it. :) and kept believing that im better than this, not that i think i deserve better, but as in im better than this shit so its not gonna be pulling me down for that long.

we'll be friends, thats for sure. :)

Lastly, thank you to those who was there for me. those who wanted and tried to be there and consoled me only to get scolded by me (im sorry). those who worried for me, those who loved me, those who cared so much that they are angry at nick, those who thought i deserve much better. thank you darlings. you guys are angels. :) Loves.

end of agenda 1. like a LONG only.

2. Exams are over

LIKE FINAL-FKING-LY! :) exams were scheduled 7feb-11feb. all 5 days of chinese new year. 5 modules, everyday back to back. Its pretty sickening and honestly, very stressful and also spoiled the entire cny mood. :( For the exams i met up with Amanda a couple of times to study at Je Library. pretty productive if you asked me.

This exams i really didnt put in my best. like everything was really so fking last minute. we all know that i dont attend lectures and when i do attend tutorials, half the time im too distracted and am not listening. So the preparation for the papers apart from marketing management, was all done the night before. the 5 days became a routine for me. all papers start at 10am and ends around 12pm. head home and snooze till around 7. laze and get into the study mood at around 9pm. sometimes even later. study till 3am and hit the sacks. wake at 6 and recap and restudy before going for the paper again.

thats why im really lacking sleep and i look like crap now. really! my eyes are so small no amount of eyeliner and false eyelash could help. :\ the best part is theres no holidays after the exams. only 2 days before we start our industrial placement project, in short its called the Attachment.

Okay, Mktg mgmt paper was ok, not too bad. Business finance literally murdered me. Essential finance was a breeze. Efma was not too bad, i dont evenknow if i am correct, i didnt bother to go compare answers with my classmates because! if i pass, id be damn happy. blaw was the besssssst. because its pretty simple.LOLS. =)

lets just hope i dont see any of this next semester. shit.

3. Random Events

Theres been countless parties really and celebrations and all. mmms. till now, those that made an impression was Rebel with the baby girls. :) i would have truly enjoyed myself had i not over drank and got like so fking emo. hahaha! i cried on and off. jeh got pretty high from the booze and she really dont like to admit it even until now. lols! she frenched me lah! wtf. lols hit the dance floor with the wrong mood. the guy kept trying to dance with us which was an add on to my already foul mood. left early because i couldnt take it. i was literally sobbing in the cab home. Apple and all sent me home and someone have tocome down to fetch me up somemore. wtf. it was damn baddddddd. jeh was damn angry and sad to see me the way i was that day. i remembered seeing her tweet about it the next day. :) <3 what would i do without this girls you tell me? =)

Theo's birthday at FAIRYPOINT chalet. much to my annoyance it is located right beside the one we had months back. only difference is this time round, i was the one driving and i was alone. the best part is the GPS couldnt locate the address and i kept driving around the same route, which somehow managed to scare me alittle. :) Many people was there. finally met his gf and ardys gf. mmms, Ardy had a bunch of friends there. Warren brought his gf also. thida was there. Guowen elena and even jensen. mmms... oh theo's indo friends candra gaso and all came by also. played cirlce again but this time round the cirlce was so damn damn damn huge. seriously, they have to play it in the sitting area and not the room. cannot accommodate that many in the room. didnt play because i was driving. or rather, drive because i duwanna end up drinking. haha. =)ran two errands for them also. 1 was to fetch thida from changi vill and another was to fetch the indo boys with aris from changi v. Talked to dan, zane, warren even benson about the whole RS episode. haha. =) all of them were like 'wtf?' and pointed me to the direction of moving on. they are a very nice bunch of friends. really. :) i left them early tho. say around midnight, i remember speeding my way home with the windows down just for the feel of being in control.

Rebel with Candra and Nicchong. rebel again really. nick came with amanda. C was with me and gladys. i was quite worried that they would not clique but i was really worrying too much la. in short, i met a lot of people that night. i got high on booze, we all were. and i partied hard and had a looooot of fun. amanda was so high she kind of uh.. kissed gladys la. and it was something more than just a kiss really. oh well. nick was ok with it also. whaaaaat!~. they left early tho. I left with the rest when the club closed. ate out at spize before going home. And edrick actually remembered NICK. im surprised. i thought they hardly talk. lols. We all had fun but C. cos C has got some rs issue more complicated than mine at that point of time. C said it would have been more fun if there were more girls there at the party. LOLS. it was too last minute. i wasnt planning to go party that night. none of us were. we were just slacking at bpp starbucks then the smses came and then we all had the mood to party. i was wearing my dr marts and clubbed with it. first time ever, clubbing with flats. anyway that day, i reached home at 6+. LOLS. :)

There was the many days spent at town with kok and all in attempt to get cny clothes and shoes. :) thats also when i got my dr marts and slowly, my appetite back. love asparagus with pork. :D then cutting of hair and dying it red.. again at Far east. only to have it rectified at Shunji. 0.0 waste my moneyyyyy! hahaha. =) there was also chilling with the indo boys at town to get their cny watches. mmms, the many chillax session with shimah and nasri at woodlands. what else?

Impromptu Powerhouse with Aki and Jiesi. Was supposed to hit Butter / rebel with nicchong and amanda and some ns boys la but it was cancelled cos they quarreled. And i only had 2 days of holidays, 2 nights to stay out late before IPP. i really didnt want to waste it. and Aki saw my tweet. Asked me outt.. after knowing her for 5 years, really this is the first time partyin with her. :) touched powerhouse early around 11 plus. Denise nick(Another one) and suen saw my tweet and told me theyre there also. so we meet up there. once a little high from the booze aki and i headed straight for the podium. the last time i danced there i remembered was with jessie and jun and nickteo(xbf) below. that means the last time i was at powerhouse was eooooons ago. i remembered i was wearing the pink sexyback dress. haha. i remembered jun puking also!=D mmms, aki was pretty high la. she danced like no tomorrow, i like! we really danced the entire night away. podium hopped and all. Mostly we danced with girls. or i danced with girls.. lols. denise and suen can dance also lorrrrr! but denise was wearing the wrong shoes and it hurts so she cant dance much. haha. poor thing. nick cannot dance for nuts. -_- and jiesi wasnt high enough to dance because she cant drink much, due to her gastric problems. had fun with the girls. my legs gave way to the hours of non stop dancing. i really mean gave way.. cudnt get up when i got down. embarassing much. but its funny. :) and it happens ALL THE TIME in theclubs la.now my thighs are aching so bad like as if i had 4 hours of volleyball PT.

denise and all going butter next week. i'll see how things goes.

that should be it.

4. Chinese new year

This year was relatively quiet. As in, i wasnt my usual CNY high this year because of the nearing exams. So there wasnt really much mood in visiting and angpaos. all i wanted was to quietly stay home and study at night, which did not happen. lols! and because i am single this year, there is many houses to visit. also EVERYONE IS OUT OF TOWN. =( Renny, C, candra and the boys, who else? i remember quite a hand ful of people.and i was left with nicchong and amanda. lols!=) thank godddddddd! so not much visitings. CNY was the norms. liondance, and all at specific houses. but i particularly enjoyed the cny party at Uncle william's because it was held outdoors. and there was sooooooo many people. faces that ive not seen in ages are all there. some of them cannot even recognise me no more because ive grown and my hair. The older cuss was comparing Maine and I. lols. One bimbo girly to the max, the other grunge and rugged. lols. they told me im like the younger eliza. good la! so mean next time i might marry a doctor. HAHAHAHAHA!=) they asked me about boyfs and i was like '-______________-' then updated them about everything la. since they are my cousins. Their neighbour wanted me to get to know their single son, so funny. i told them im not interest. LOLS.

Visit to Jarvis house - Also the norms. but this time, we're all very open about things. Jiawei, Serchuan and Weiquan was there. to my surprise weiquan is now in NS at gombak camp. sooooo familiar. LOLS! hes under dongli also. we talked about a lot of stuff la. nick was one of the topic. cynthia and meili came also. and daotong. omg, i think daotong kenna blackmagic. LOLS! he'sSUPER into thai girls. wtf. cyn also recently single. Uncle(Jarvisdad) ask me if im ok anot. omg la, so updated, he even asked " The botak boy right". hahaha. =) told him everything about it. then they compared Cyn and i. it was a really hilarious episode. they then try to match make cyn and this other guy called ivan. -_- cyn entertained them also la. not too bad the whole thing. Jarvis sent us home after that.. nice.

5. Random stuff

okay, for one my laptop finally died. ive been computer deprived for like a month or so. Apparently the motherboard crashed. so we decided to fix it for 300 bucks to last me a year until i graduate then change to a new one. so now im blogging using my aunt's lappy. other than that, ive decided to do something about my room! its huge with a toilet but its crappy and messy. meaning i want a room revamp. everything got to go! except for the build in closet and my bedframe. but first things first, i need to do a thorough spring clean and dump all the unnecessary stuffs.

ok i think ive got nothing much to blog about anymore. now that its raining and i feel sleepy all over again. Apples place for cny later. zzzzz. tireddddd.

Please don't go.

2011-01-11T02:08:00.000+08:00

I need you. Please dont go.. :'(

exhaustion

2010-12-11T00:57:00.000+08:00

i know right! ive got like a thousand post with the same title. im really exhausted. really.and maybe im lacking creativity, i admit i havent been reading much books. so, that probably accounts for it.anyway! im am finally FREE off my ICAs. today was my last paper..Marketing Management.i will say its my favourite module of the lot.but i shan't say the paper was easy. 10 Multiple choice5 True / false1 Case studyand honestly the casestudy was a killer.BUT I DONT CARE LA.as long as i pass, i am a happy girl.i really do not enjoy poly so much.so much so that i really lack the motivation to thrive and do well for my papers.:\ isnt a good thing. but ive been trying and trying and i still cant find it. the old me.so as they say.. people change.but then again, ive always been doing well and not, well and not.alternative cycle.like N level with whooooping results and top the entire nation.Nitec was so damn bad.Higher nitec was good enough to get into a poly which isnt the last and a good course.Poly - shit ass results.LOL.THIS HAS GOT TO CHANGE.maybe its because ive mugged to hard for a period of time, thus slacking another period of time, then mugging again.whatever la! excuses excuses excuses.a whole pile of bullcrapanyway i am just so glad that icas are over. seriously after TEP, i think i kind of lost my footings. too long never study. this is what it does to me. sigh!:)Was in an unreasonable mood today.Because its my last paper and i finally pulled it through. i really was looking forward to meeting boyf after the paper.but when i met him, face was semi black because he sat in the car for a whole 45 mins waiting for me. then he drove off HOME.which kinda makes me feel really really grouchy. because cmon! i was looking forward to it so much. then we had to go to HIS PLACE. :(i was really frustrated and very disappointed.REALLYthat i lay down and play iphone till i dozed off.. AND THAT MADE ME EVEN MORE ANGRY.because i really didnt want to sleep the day away.. its like really a waste of time..not doing anything. really.i am not a home person. not in any of my past relationship and not in this one as well.i guess thats one point that cant change.FUCKKKKK! I WAS JUST TYPING AND THE "C" FROM MY KEYBOARD JUST FLEW OUT! :( I NEED A NEW LAPTOP LA. MINE IS FUCKING DINOSAUR AGE ALREADY!ANYWAY!we were suppose to go running in the evening. my inital plan was! after school. go china town. meet Kris at Lot 1. buy youghurt. and everything, it will already be 7+. go to his place to chill for 1/2 hr then go RUN. but because i was in a foul mood and was anything but happy, i lost the mood to go run.:\sian la.anyway, thats all that happened today.i managed to come home early which means LESS time at his place.and more time on my own at home.which is def better than going to his place and have no fkshit to do at all.this makes me happier really.:)ohhhh okays.im going to bed now.waking up at 7 tomorrow morning.send mom to work. then head down to pasir ris with dad and bro and whisky to meet Maine and her friend, Hilda and SPIKE!:)in case youre wondering. spike is a british bulldog that i will be adopting FROM TOMORROW.unless dad last minute wanna back out.. i make sure i pull a face so long.. i have to drag it on the floor.:)but i really doubt it la.i really am looking forward to see spike tomorrow.:Dexcited much!GOOD NIGHTS WORLD

ICAs up to my neck

2010-12-06T22:38:00.000+08:00

many many test. on and off on and off.so sick of them. none of which modules i truly enjoy. maybe only blaw and marketing.boring.dont really likes those that has formats and figures anymore.anyway i failed my accounting by 2marks.but wth.and i just received my first warning letter for the semester.which isnt so bad! considering all is still above 90%:Danyhoooos rennys back in town alr! <3tomorrows jamie's wedding.much to do.tomorro whave ICT ICA as well.fml.and i got my iphone 4 on saturday.free since we had 210$ voucher.the next 550 will be coming early january.im quite addicted to twitter since im able to access it like anytime i want.:Dbye peeps.gonna go practice ict.

NEW HAIR

2010-11-30T00:53:00.000+08:00

Well, ive chopped off my locks again. Shunji matsuo had the honour of doing so, again. :)jane was the hairstylist.anyway, i have the guts to chop them boyshort now. so its short cropped.good bye to bob, had enough of it.and i am loving this new hair. :)i bumped into cynthia ysd after work (last day).she recognised me instantly! but the shock in her eyes was soooo obvious la. <3oh well!:D

MIA-ed 1 month

2010-11-23T00:41:00.000+08:00

so sorry. its been close to a month since ive last blogged. :Dwell much have happened!renny's back in sg! which is a helluva good thing. We're planning a trip to Cebu or Krabi on the 18 dec.and then ITS GONNA BE AWESOME!:DAlso, ive watched another series of shows. - Vampire diaries. i LOVE IT! DAMON IS HAWWWWWWT I LIKEEEEE!hahahaah! :D still awaiting the next episode to be out.How i met your mother - BARNEY IS HAWT. :D LOLS!i think i somehow watch this kinda shows cos one, it cracks me up. 2, the boys are cute. :D whatevvvvver.anyway ive been pretty busy fleaing around with lynnie wong from BP.uhhh,also there was this trip to jb which was more than just awesome! 3days 2 nights spent with the bp people. (if ive already blogged about this, i am so sorry. im recently suffering from STM) was there to celebrate nick's 22. ohhhh well! anyway i cant wait till dec. why?cos theres a flea ! cos we're going to KRABIcos its CHRISTMAScos i'll be getting my iphone!=Dso much to look forward to!ok im gonna sleep now.currently suffering from Stomach flupoor me and my tummy.im gonna sleep.nights folks!

Start of school

2010-10-25T17:21:00.000+08:00

yup, the first week of school has already ended. so its the start of the second week of school and i have failed to attend monday morning lessons twice. :\ booooo! i should put in more effort in waking up in time for school. anyhoooo. just had another flea with blackdollhouse at clarke quay just last saturday. response was good! will go again if possible. :)coming flea would be this friday, at Singapore poly. :)okok i shall blog later. boyf very frustrated over i dunno what also. sigh!sian.

Retail Therapy

2010-10-11T15:44:00.000+08:00

Im kinda stressed up with the blogshop stuff really. Maybe i need a partner. But i dont want to have to accomodate someone else's opinions..arrgh!anyway! im awaiting replies from RocketSprees. Im interested in spreeing for one of their booties heelies. :D looks damn good and is damn cheap. so, im awaiting reply.. i want it black. RAWRRRRRR!:D Online shopping really burns ones pockets. theres more than just 1 shoe that i want. more than 3 pieces of clothes that i love. i really dont know what to get. BOO! cant wait to finish school. Heading to the supplier's later on. After that i will go on and meet Isaac and all. WEEEEE!

mind fucking days.

2010-10-11T00:39:00.000+08:00

these few days have been like mind fuck days for me. theres like so many gruesomely long trains of thoughts. :\ So many things to consider so many things to think about, to fret about and so much more.:(Anyhooooooos! i kinda miss blogger very much. onsugar seems kind of blahhhh now. soo, i might just activate BV's again. :D how awesome is that? very right!? :D but but butt..... the BIG but! i have to manually add in the posts that ive posted here.. so, ya.. thats a no go.so im really not sure. fml.ohhh! We met up with Isaac, JasmineOH!, Sean B, Shimah, Nasri and Oyan! :) only person lacking with, shaoqi. Period cramps.. oh well, thank godness i dont have to tendency to have cramps like every time of the month. Therefore, there is no way i am able to understand that. poor shaoqi. Esp since isaac is finally in SG. Lols!I'll soon be receiving my very very very FIRST wedding invitation. :) It's going to be Jasmine's on December 7! held at Pan Pacific. awesommmmeeeee. Nic was saying we'd all have to be suited up. Dohhhh! obviously, we're too much addicted to How i met your mother. :) but yes, we'll all be dressing UP. dohs! which means, I NEED A NEW NICE DRESS. :D always a reason to shop.its my first close friend's wedding man! i gotta like be pretty and all and take a hell load of pictures to make memories! :) ok craps. i just want to look good, okays? :) hahaha. happy for her. and thank god my first wedding invitation is at a hotel. mom just went to one at some restaurant this evening. asked me and bro along but no one wanted to go. LOLS.i cant wait lah! :D We chilled out much the night before. First was just me and nic on our way to marina to check some stuff. Then isaac called to announce that he's in town and is going to meet jiemin first. so'll join us later in the evening. After we're done with our stuff and food and all.. Nic called isaac and isaac said he was at north point, near town..me and nic went " -_________________________- "HAHAHAHAHA! :DMet them up at Holland V in the end for some coffee but the parking was so full we ended up parking at the private housing area. Walk up to the back of holland V and chill at this ice cream joint. YUMMMMMM~ Nas, shimah and Oyan met us around 10.30 at RAIL MALL! After that sean B came half way through. Ohhhh! we met Tom chan as well.. Kinda awkward tho..We were all like " Hi " and everything but deep down it was like "wtf?!" ohhh, but for isaac's case.. it was like "WTF!!! WTF!!! WTF!!! "his expression was PRICELESS. i would want to see THAT again if possible. :D maybe at Jiemin's wedding.. ahahaha.OH! FLEA ESCAPE yesterday with Blackdollhouse and Femmeaddiction. Saw a friend - Running thread, there as well. niceeee! sales wasnt as good as the very first flea that i have, but nevertheless, its still okay. :) i had fun. tho it was hot like shit. Then Today! was EAST COAST PARK with baby to go see the "world's Animal's day!" event held by SPCA. :) i swear there were so many many many cute furkids there. i saw many tobey look alike... awwwwww! but i know thats not tobey. i want a dog smarter than whisky please. bigger if possible.. :)Actually we spent less than 20 minutes there! We headed for carl's jr for chilli fries and onion rings and oreo milkshakes.. LOVE! pigged out on the drive home (to nic's place). we just had no where to go, and nic just wanted to satisfy me cos i have been ranting "i dont want to stay at home the entire damn day" pretty much lately. so, kudos baby. thanks for bringing me out. next up! Reptile park please. science centre and also, i want to go to the night safari since they have halloween now. Universal studio shall wait till the rides are all up and going.i miss renny maria man. ive been so busy this days i hardly have time for anything! :(anyway, to all my friends. those who blogs, please please please help me advertise my blogshop.i am trying to reach and expand my customer base.thanks darlings.

PARTAYE PEOPLE ON THE DANCEFLOOR!

2010-10-01T15:44:00.000+08:00

Will be here tonight with many FSRC-ians. Honestly, they're the coolest people i know in NYP. NYP really suck. my classmates are like the plainest lot EVER! man.

but im having headache now. and im going through a presentation first.

:( pounding head since yesterday. Honestly cant wait to party tomorrow.

I met up with sarah lek ysd at cityhall. shes no longer with fred now. but i hope she's coping well. i honestly feel that she's subconciously busying herself too much with work and when the time comes, she'll break. i worry.

anyway! PARTY HARD TONIGHT!

Wall street: Money never sleeps.

2010-09-29T14:52:00.000+08:00

Caught this movie as a part of our team bonding for FSRC. Honestly, i thought " Which teenager in their right mind would choose to watch this movie?".

*2 syallables Daaaa mnnnn!

mans, its not too bad. but a tad too draggy. Cant stand it. 19 of us went to watch the show.

Daniel, Aristheo, Zane, Guangliang, Guoming, Regina, Sumathy, Leeyee, Farz, Arveet, Zhi min, Marcus, Warren, Tiffany Wong (me), Nicholas Teo (boyf), Guowen and i cannot remember who else. We have to clock 25 hours each of seminars and bondings. so watching this show gave us 2hrs each.

and i am down by 15hours. again! *2 syallables damn.

Its really not too bad la. but it took 2 hours for them to act out a simple story line. i dont like it. but heck! i need 15hrs more.

But anyway, me and nick's really going through a rough patch. quarrelling and quarrelling and quarrelling. To the point that both of us cant take it any much longer. he cant trust me, i cant stand not being trusted and given the freedom i so deserve. we had a long talk.. many times these days. Always it ends up being all nice and all, only to BLOW like a time bomb soon after.

Theres no solution really, other than stick together and try make things work by him trying not to tie me down too much. i cant stand it really cant anymore. i've not strike a balance in my personal life and love life. i have not seen my family more than i see his - which makes me even more angry!. oh well. it got pretty bad. and i am trying to put all behind me. and try to see if things can work out.

if not, then thats just too bad. maybe we are not meant to be. if we dont work out. maybe we will next time when we are both older and no longer want to have much fun and want to stay home and rot and die then we'll work out. :)

but i have a hunch that things will change once he starts having friends again. i cant wait till he starts school. HURRHURRR~

Meet ups

2010-09-28T16:57:00.000+08:00

The last week, i finally met up with 2 group of friends. although its not 2 whole group of friends, there are many missing faces.. but i was still very happy to see them. It also made me realise, how much i miss laughin till the tears well up and stomach and face threatens to cramp. i do miss those times.

more than anything else in the world. except for renny. :)

Met Jessie Apple Jun and Dennis on friday. Head on to henderson and i've got to blow the candles for my 22nd birthday. It was the usuals, hangout chill slack thing. :) We talked and laughed and joked and catched up. All agreed that we missed the days when we had to meet up everyday till the wee hours in the morning. It felt good and i was damn happy.

Cant remember what i did on saturday. I remembered working till 8. then, i dont quite recall what happened. Dont think anything interesting happened on saturday.

Sunday was great. work till 6. homed and get the car. Met abby, fidz and michelle at ion. We finally decided to chill at west coast mackers. So we headed there while we were waiting for het and her man. They reached west coast before us. :) I started asking about the rest who couldnt make it.

Emy had problems with transport and he stays at Tampines.

Syafiq was working.

Taufid was on standby at the F1.

Luqman was --- dont remember what he was up to that he couldnt meet up.

Feez is in camp.

Wan was at raye.

Dan was at f1.

Fairuz, her number was out of use and she is staying at yishun and no transport.

Liang had wedding dinner to attend. Nizam was - They totally cut of contact after the incident like 1154321 years ago.

and i cannot remember who else. but Dan and Wan did came down to meet us. :) And we planned SNAPP aka Heart attack. haha. mich brought the cards and it was her idea. we had fun tho it was a kiddish game. :) It was a good idea. everything was very much animated. we laughed a LOT. mich had enjoyed herself although she was injured in the game of heartattack. LOLS.

It is a small world. Mich do know many of my friends without me needing to introduce them. she knew luqman, fai, taufid, hafidx, hafeez.. not bad at all. plus when they converse in malay, she managed to catch up with it. i am impressed. :)

but anyway we all headed home at around 2. i had to send mich home first and touched home at 2.43am. :)

Anyway if you're still wondering what my hair looks like, do look into FB.

if not, heres one picture for you

:) Save the bad comments to yourself please. im having a love hate relationship with my hair. i couldnt decide if i love it anot.

Anyways, im catching Wall Street : Money Never Sleeps with the FSRC people later. sad life. :(

k bye

Stressed up.

2010-09-24T10:50:00.000+08:00

yes, my life's kinda stressed up right now. ive got like tonnes to do and i am hard press for time. i have not seen all my already-drifting-close friends in a long while. this includes Jessie and group, Corinna and group and Hafidz that group as well.

I've got a presentation later. i have to do my blogshop order soon. ROAR!

I met up with lynnie. yes lynnie as in lynn wong from bp to go for a flea which was a huge disappointment. but nevermind that. She is still her. the way she talk and react. her animated expression and all. i enjoyed being in her company. but she's so skinny now. and it is skinny! =) she's trying to gain weight but cant. -_- how i wish i had this problem. LOLS.

My birthday was kinda sad. i cried my eyes out. anddddd.. got over it the very day. :) When i reached home i saw flowers and a note from bff. i broke down again. cant help it really.

Ashley's 2 babies are bigger now and has fur. their eyes are finally opened and are crawling around the cage like some army men crawling on their bellies. ok, maybe that isnt a really good description but wtf? i cant think of more. haha.

Nic and i agreed that we should have more personal time to ourselves. to go about our own stuff. like hang out with our friends and all. for him, it would be going fishing and all with his mates, since i do not enjoy fishing anymore. -_- Honestly, it feels like a slight down turn in our rs. Is it always liek this? but why does all my rs feels this way? SIGH!

but then again, i think im thinking too much and am reading too deep into it. boooooo!

i kinda miss volleyballing. i havent played in a long time alr. maybe 1 month? god knows. im too lazy. plus my hair would be a big ass problem since they cant be tied up right now. -_- ohhhhh! did i mention i cut my hair again? 2 days before my bday?

its now a short cropped concave bob. not really what i wanted. but it was what reanny wanted to see. LOLS. =) i dont care. but im starting to miss long curly locks again. LOLS. maybe i should be keeping it all long now. =)) but when it is its usual curl like mad length, i'd straighten it la.

so its the same cycle like 17 yr old me. LOLS chop short, medium rebond, long curly.

K bye people. i gotta go get rdy for school. need to pack the formal clothes for presentation.

Updates

2010-09-15T11:10:00.000+08:00

yes, i have been so ultimately busy. with again, all the same things.I've been to my first flea with all my opi's at Scape youth mall with Eliza and Anna. and have met two to three very interesting and witty ladies that are my neighbours at the flea. They are smart and pretty, perfect combination. From TP and NTU, doing Banking and accounts. wow. Also, i have lived the life of my bestfriend some few days before the flea started. i was running errands, tho and fro. Google-ing PRINT shops, calling up for quotations and all. All that's a norm for design students, but so very foreign to me. Got my name card printed and my label printed. :) Name card only the last minute one for the flea. i have yet to get my official one, more expensive and prettier and more prof, according to renny printed. It was weird, to always alias with her through BBM!like she's still at guilin view, but in actual fact, shes dunno how many thousand kilometers away from me. SIGH!tell me what'll i do without her?:) She's so independent now. honestly, i am very proud of her. learning to cook and all sorts. coping on her own as well. :) i envy the freedom she has. although she do not see it the way i see it, i feel her. and i understand she misses home much. but i guess i'd be a bit different, and we all know renny and me we're two worlds apart but managed to stay bestfriends for like forever. i might just enjoy it a little. to know that i am on my own. with no one there. to take charge of my own life. really, i would like that. i guess it is the same like i like to drive alone at night. but dread walking upstairs alone cos of the weird dreams last time. i like it cos i feel like i am in control, of my own life. i do not need to report to anyone, i have my own room, my own apartment, my own living to do. if only dad was alil' younger and more wealthy, i would not hesitate to go study overseas. but i guess god dont give us everything. Sigh! Although dad still do not mind me going, but it will really be too heavy a financial burden to him. plus he just got me my favourite car. SIGH!Other than all these, well.. I did not participate in the Volleyball Women's open. Because i really am in no position to commit anything. weekends are undeniably lauder's. weekdays will be school till 5.30pm and really, i really need to keep constantly do up my blog. thats why i am unable to commit.alas, i dont even go for training much anymore. i dont even have time to do my nails! DAMNATION!Ohhh, and Euphoricnails is doing okay so far. the only thing is, i really get quite demoralised sometimes. like its okay if its tiring, its okay if its troublesome. but everytime i hear a bad news, i emotionally almost automatically jump to "stress" mode. which is really sick! and stress mode it is until i've come up with what i shall do about it. there is no way as i will think " nah, lets just do nothing bout it till it affects me". this has taken its toll on my concentration and honestly, it has exhaust me considerably much. Boyf has mentioned that these stress is unnecessary. Dad has reassured me many times that this amount of money meant nothing if lost to buy me an experience.On top of that, i've finally FINALLY went shopping at ion with Boyf just a few days ago. with not much intention to spend much. but i came back with a pair of jeggings, a top, a pair of shorts and a bangle. damage was about 140? yea right, no intention to spend.. :) We caught Resident evil with his mates. honestly, i find it rather disappointing. SIGH!ohhh! did i mention? Nick is outta NS alr. :) May i say "ORD LO". haha. So babe's intending to study Biz management in SIM. welldone. i am proud of him. least he's not dumb to STOP studying and go to work. although that! would be a good thing as we'll have much moolahs to spend, but yea, i rather he go back to school. no one wants to be with a no one in the long run do they? :) remember, one step and a time. i am not looking FAR AHEAD if that's what you readers have in mind. its obvious, you want whoever you are dating with to be someone smart, capable and dependable. it will always be preferable compared to someone who is not. right ladies? :)what else? let me seee....oh! my birthday is coming and I CANT BELIEVE I WILL BE HAVING ONE PRESENT LESS. since renny's not in town. LOLS! =) nick's stressed till all his hair is threatenin to turn white already on what to get for me. he has learnt his lesson from last years birthday to consult me for my present. LOLS. last year he got me agnes b earrings which i didnt use more than 5 times. i appreciate the gift, but its just not me to be wearing that. and he understands. he now understands that, to me or in my family, we do not surprise each other when it comes to present. and he has cultivated the same practice. he asked me what i want for my bday this year.honestly, i do not know.what should i be wanting?its easy to answer this qsn if he was my dad, but he is not. it would be easy if it was dad. Ohhh, i want an air ticket to melbourne. ohhh! i want a ticket to uk with nick and family. Ohhhh, i want a louis vuittion wallet.it was THAT easy to think of something i want and answer. But anyway is there anything at all that i should be wanting? please suggest girls.okays!gotta get rdy for sch now. FML FML FML FML!LOVEtiffany

MUCH TO DO. LITTLE LITTLE TIME.

2010-08-10T20:16:00.000+08:00

Honestly im renny wondering about renny. she's supposed to have msged me or called me or msned me or fb me. but yeah, nothing. absolute silence.

sigh!~

anyway i am really up to my neck with the blogshop stuff.

and i would be really happy if you girls could link me up on ur blog? :) i'd appreciate it so much. thanks babe! =)

Loves, Tiffany

thousands apologies

2010-08-05T20:13:00.000+08:00

I AM YET AGAIN AND ONCE AGAIN, SO VERY SORRY FOR MIA-ING.

i've really got shit load of things to do. therefore, everythng shall be in point form.

1. SORRY to the bestest girl in my life. Because i cannot be there to send you off due to work issues. im sorry i cried so hard till i made you cry. :) and you have yet to get back to me as promised. i wonder if u're doing ok. i miss u much. :) contact me soon bestie.

2. Happy belated birthday to apple. thank you so much for inviting me down to your party at the Marina Bay Sands. the hotel was pretty. Sorry i got abit too tired because i drove for more then 1 hour due to the NDP preview roadblock and the also because there wasnt any available carpark anywhere that me and jeh have to park at suntec. called for cab for 30mins to be finally able to book one. thus, got a little cranky. I hope you truly did enjoyed yourself. :) im glad that you invited me really.

3. SCHOOL IS SO MUCH OF A PAIN. i have to chiong two reports after this.

4. i am up to my neck with the opening of my blogshop selling OPI's at an affordable price, because i got hold of the supplier. :) not earning much, but its a start. =)) DO SUPPORT ME OKAY!?

www.euphoricnails.blogspot.com

Add me on facebook and Like the fan page please. thank you very much darlings.

fb name - Euphoricnails

Post

2010-07-21T09:32:00.000+08:00

DAMN GOOOD! Watched it with babylove at Lot1 (IKR, LIKE OF ALL OTHER PLACES.) a great 2hr plus movie. value of money. =) i love this. WEEEEEEE!

the twilight saga - eclipse

2010-07-15T22:54:00.000+08:00

Watched it today with love at cineleisure. Mmms.. Not too bad I suppose. Some sort like the book. There's just one thing I don't like.. All the twilight movies, they're just a tad too draggy! Couldn't stand it. My knees where killing me half way through the movie. It was a real distraction. I felt so uncomfortable that I wished the show to end. Best part is, that has got nothing to do with the crampness of the movie theatre. Cos we had front row sits. LOL.Sigh! Its hard bloggin on bb. Tmrs! I'm tired..

WELCOME BACK TO THE SOCIETY HONNEY!

2010-07-14T09:16:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was guuuuuuud! its finally 21days! which means honeybun is finally out.=) it feels good to have him back. it surprises me much.as in, ive never ever ever felt so relieved to have someone back.i didnt realise i missedh im THAT much. oh well!took half days leave.so he came to fetch me from school at 12. And we went to BPP to have iciban sushi. :)and he really DID put on weight. but i love him all the same la.hahahaha! =)after sushi crashed his place to watch cell211 with him. den we went to tracyeinny's flagship store at pickering street.spent 60 bucks in there. WTF!walked over to have Curry Noodles! the one that i told him about when i was having training for directasia at North Canal.it was still GOOOOOOOOD~ =)we loved it.and then! a petshop opposite ten mile junction for Rabbit hay and pellets.den watched new moon at his place.cos he wants to watch eclipse, and i have not watched new moon.so we rewatched it with me. =Dden it was HOME HOME HOME HOME! =Da day well spent.=) today shall be a training day!

exhaustion

2010-07-12T17:25:00.000+08:00

mentally and phyically drained.still at school. waiting for the last 5 minutes to go home. waiting for Ms Khoo to announce time to go home. sigh! OK TIME TO GO! BYE!

new car, new me.

2010-07-08T17:17:00.000+08:00

oh yea oh yea oh yea~ =)i love the new car. seriously, i've never spent more than 10 minutes at my block's carpark tryin to find a parking lot. usually i'd just park by the road. but for my new baby, i am seriously not taking any chances! =) there was only one parallel parking lot with a motocycle at the end of the lot, making the lot smaller than usual. that was probably why it was left empty.i tried parking in it a couple of times. cannot.. so i drove one more round around my block. no lots. check out the carpark at the opposite block, no lot as well. therefore, i just parked vertically on the parallel lot. hopefully nothing happens to the car. i'd be really angry if anything happens to it.received many praises on the car. jeh, yanqi, nic, john, peifen, my neighbour, alif and many many more. makes me and dad feel that the money was well spent. =)ohhhh! that reminded me that uncle ringo called me ysd during volleybal and i didnt get back to him yet. gotta call him later.also!!!!!!!!tiffany's no longer with the long curly locks. yup. i've chopped them off. all of it. now my hair barely touches my shoulder much. damn light! i love it. i have had this hair for 2 days now. and so far, no regrets. my hair was chopped off at Shunji Matsuo hair studio at wellington building ( for those of you whose got no clue where that is. stand at Paragon's taxi stand and walk out straight across the road, there's a salon on your right.). was there with renny. she chopped her hair shorter. touching shoulders. cleopatra tho. =D i like it on her. she looks fresher. but i prefered it shorter on her, that would be less common. but she's happy with her hair. =)but i got something a lil more sporty. its similiar to what i used to have. the style with the red violet hair. yeah, that! just that now its shorter. the old style had side part side sweep fringes. this one has back pulled to the front side sweep. mmms. but i'm gonna do panel highlights to it. i hope it will look good. =)nic says he'll spon me. but then we wouldnt noe la. my family likes the change. most of my friends who arent as close dont like it and prefer my long hair. oh well.. importantly, i like it. my family likes it. if i am not wrong i hope my boyfriend likes it. =D LOLScos he saw me the first night. but it was longer. i went back the second night to shorten it. cos it was a little too long and i wasl ooking like a taiwanese boy and i HATE IT. so i shorten it. hurrhurr. =)now im so loving it. like! I CAN FUKING COMB MY HAIR LIKE NOBODYS BUSINESS. which was like since how long have i not have the luxury to do so!?LOL!k bye.

enraged.

2010-07-08T11:39:00.000+08:00

OH MY FUCKING GOD!i just typed a whole wall of text and onsugar swallowed it. oh my god!this is not fair.fuck its not even in my draft! fuck!

the red baby.

2010-07-04T12:23:00.000+08:00

HELLO SMELLY PEOPLE READING MY SMELLY BLOG! =)well, yes. my red's baby finally here already parked downstairs waiting to send me to work. ahahaha! =) we picked her off from the volkswagen showroom yesterday. and my, the first time i saw her parked at the "car delivery" room waiting for me, i was estatic! =Di kept going " ohhh my god, ohhh my godd.." LOLS! when dad keep asking me "how? you like it? how?" i was like "OF COURSE I LIKE IT. I LOVE IT! what are you talking about? its ABSOLUTELY HAWT!" LOLS.then he kept teasing me saying how polo is better for me. well, but we all know thats pure bullshit. i dont like the polo. if he dont want the scirocco, i wouldnt mind settling for Eos! =D only if its red and convertible. LOLS.i was damn happy okay! beyond words! =) i kept snapping pictures. but i haven edit it to cover the carplate number. therefore, its not ready to be posted yet. =)i was the one who drove the car outta the showroom because dad wanted me to. so we drove down to CCK to the temple for blessing. then down to sinming to respray the old car. then to pasir panjang to collect dads stuff from the office. den home to drop off the parents.after which, its quality time now with me and my baby. =D took her down to meet Nick. =) I SWEAR! I LOVE HER SO MUCH. it's so damn responsive! i love the fact that she picks up speed pretty darn fast. theres so many features in the car that i love so much. its really QUALITY vs QUANTITY. comparing to dads japanese MPV's. it's no wonder most uncles and cussie's of mine all got continental cars. =D im tryin not to rev up too much as i really need to run in the engine first. =\\to the bitch who scratched two huge ass long lines along my old car:hey, i dont mind u scratching my old car, know? but if u lay your fking dirty uncivilised finger on my new baby, i SWEAR! i will camp down stairs and when i catch you, ur head'll roll. well, thats if you survived my mom's curses already. =Dbahhhhhh! =) drove myself down to Vivo to get rennys present and some cakes. after that, met them up at suntec for dinner. indon fooddd. kinda ok la. but i guess i was shagged already. therefore kinda stonning and not responsive towards people. drove them down to marina barrage. once it hits midnight, just nice rain started settling in. so i ddrove back to woodlands where they all took a cab back. =)i cant deny the fact that it still scares me to drive alone at night. the worst part is walking home alone. it scares me.ok bye!i smell something drastic coming on. do you?

TGIF! <3

2010-06-25T11:47:00.000+08:00

THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY! :)

It's the last day of the 2nd week of my TEP 2nd stopover! meaning close to 2 weeks couped up in the Callcenter inside school. 9-5.30 every single day! and we only have like 22.5hrs leave to apply. minimum leave is 2hours! damns.

and ive already burnt 7 hrs! because i took 2.5hrs on tuesday for my nail appointment. and 4.5 hrs for this coming monday because hon's able to come out of camp to go the National Skin Center. so i shall see him and be with him throu the entire appointment la. so that makes 7hours! meaning!!!! 15.5 hr of leave left for 8 weeks of TEP.

die.

anyway! today's the 5th day that ive not seen baby. well, he kenna SOL and is stuck in CAMP for 21days. which means, its like we're taking a long break from seeing each other. =( we're still contacting. bbming and calling every now and then the only time i'd get to see him is on monday! so i cant wait. =( and yes, i miss him! =((

but i shall take this opportunity to just spend time on myself. i feel like chopping off my locks. and also. feel liek straightening. i really dont know.

also, ive been puting on weight. so much so that im driving myself crazy. i shall start my exercise regime. =D anyhows! i've NOT been late for school for 2 weeks and i am DAMN PROUD OF MYSELF! =D hahahahahhahaha! also im gettin so used to it already. that i always wake up 15mins before my alarm ring, just like the old days! =D yayyyy!

and im going for a flea tomorrow. mainly is to support amy's stylepisde. 50 vendors. but theres another flea behind plaza 400vendors! wanted to go with jeh but last minute cannot because aunt lotus changed her party timing from 6 to 4pm. Jeh finish work at 4pm. therefore, we cannot go together.

but i jio-ed my class girlies. so we'll see how. also apple seemed interested! =D

also i purchased a maxi dress from Daniel's Girlfriend. weeeeee! cant wait to get my hands on it on monday! WEE HEE

we'll see we'll see.

cheerios!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RENNY MARIA! <3

2010-06-24T13:36:00.000+08:00

you've officially turned 22! can no longer say like 'oh, im 21.' or 'im 22 this year'. =))

we're really growing up! and honestly it scares me a little. sigh! Anyway!

happy 22nd birthday my dear girlfriend! you're my one and only bestfriend and i really appreciate you! REALLY! <3

please have fun today! enjoy yourself in KL. and come home soon. i miss you and i wanna meet you up real soon.

bestest best wishes ! and may all your dreams be it nice or not, realistic or not, big or small -- All come true okay?

i love you bestfriend! =D

backtrack - 1month and 1week

2010-06-21T16:46:00.000+08:00

since the last post. bahhhhh! sorry. i've got no reason for not updating. just, pure laziness. =) LOLS!

Life's been quite peaceful for me but i have tonnes to update. hurrhurr. it shall all be in point form and not in order. here goes:

i ran 4clique once at 1030pm alone. and got my face serverely swollen for no reason. it wasnt itching or peeling. just, swollen.
i went to see tua peh gong after much persuasion coming from Peishan Mom Peifen yanqi and all others. first time experience and honestly, i freaked out.
i had various nightmares. frequently its all about those spiritual stuff. i dream of ghost at my place, ghost at my stairway. kitten violent slashing a small boy to the point that he was gashes filled all over and blood was gushing.
i started my second stopover for my year 2 sem 1. which means attachment to the call center. got this -confidential- project.
spent 3 days at clarke quay for product training 9-5. which was a killer, because i have to wake at 630 every morning.
renny's birthday is coming
neil is enrolled into tekong already
im getting really sick of working at lauder.
vivien came up with a proposal for me. im not sure if i will take up. but its all about business. i might just take it on. what i am afraid of is, i might not be up to it.
smokey and ashley have been mating. i wonder if its successful. =)

i've decided i confirm dont wanna play for school anymore. know i am at the call centre. and here i am blogging. boring shit.

anyhow!!!!!!! im leaving now.

cheerios.

i am. a ZOMBIE.

2010-05-17T12:38:00.000+08:00

well, i feel like one. movements are sloooow and restricted because of my bodyaches. tummy. back. arms. legs. shoulders. im gonna feel like that for a couple of days now. and seriously, i dont care if you feel im sick. cos im loving it. :)

had an entire day of volleyball yesterday. with the Velement team. played match at PHS. 3 games and we took down all. not too bad. i enjoyed myself. and during the match and i had to constantly remind the girls. -peifen, peishan and yanqi to calm down. they get agitated so very easily. by the outside and by the teammates and by themselves. but i enjoy playing with them so much. than nyp. LOLS.

anyhoooos! we had sushi at Marina after that. sashimi sashimi and more salmon sashimis. ate so much we practically almost died of overeatng. damns!

pictures will be up once shan ups them on FB.

k bye world.

im damn tired.

Post

2010-05-14T23:49:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY, URE A YEAR OLDER NOW. I WISH U ALL HEALTHY MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE.

cos to be honest, i cant do without you. i love you pops. =)

Buckeroo's today at sembawang. =) had lotsa good food. i was full even before i finish the side dishes - which was Onion rings, Mushroom soup and escargoes. by the time my steak came, i was 3/4 full. so i only had 3 - 4 slices before i give up and surrender. :)

other than the bday celebration, customer service roleplay was a BREEZE! our tutor said we did well, and that made my day. weeeee! much thanks to Zhonglin and Hongtian who are my this Sem's classmates. =)

mmms, Met nic for a teeny bit today. koi-ed and tried Icecream milktea despite ordering hazelnut. i enquired abt the icecream flavor before making my order for hazelnut. so i suppose the cashier got it all wrong. BUT IT AINT BAD REALLY! =) milky milky taste. <33

ehhhhh! what else? oh! my project management ICA1 was okay. im confident that i'll pass. its been so long since i last failed anything anyways. LOLS! but i was too tired..

ok, wednesday i played ball. and reached home at say, 11 plus? cant rememebr or was it 12? but anyways, i need to study for my paper, so i studied till 2 + den sleep till 5 den study again till 6 den sleep and overslept till 730! almost late for the paper. LOLS!

i studied just enough for the paper. not like my usual knowitall. but its like knowenoughtopass kind? =)

ohhh, i extend my condolence and deepest sympathy to nick's family. sorry for the loss of your aunt b. i know i dont react to this situations too well. cant handle them.. =\\ im sorry.

and! thats bout it.

7.5 hours

2010-05-13T01:20:00.000+08:00

to my Project Management ICA. which means 6hrs for me to sleep and study. 4 more chapters to go. dang!

am i screwed? we'll see later on today. sigh! life's a bitch.

NICKOLAS TEO. <3

2010-05-13T01:19:00.000+08:00

I know deep down you have your doubts. i know you have difficulty trusting me. i know how much you fear history repeats itself. i know i can get really fussy and demanding. i know you cannot stand it that i like to have the last say. i know deep down you somehow feel that when i grow up, i'd be like your mom(ewww). i know that in this relationship i ask for a little too much. i know that in this relationship you're the giver and i am the taker. i know that i can be the most selfish lover ever and that i think of myself before you and demand you to do the same.

believe it or not, i know my flaws hon.

i just want you to know that i appreciate everything you do for me, even though i dont say it often. even though i might seem like i take it for granted. even though i dont show the least bit of appreciation.

Thank you for everything love. :) every single little thing. from being so tired but still driving down to AMK for me to fix my koi craving, to sending me up and down everywhere in this little dot.

i guess we've passed the "quarrel everyday" phase alr. i've gotten used to your way of doing things and u, to mine. i can see it when u give in to me when im being really unreasonable (which is not something that happens all the time). i can see all that u're doing. every change that u're trying to make for me, even if u dont want to admit it. and i can finally feel and see that ure trying to trust me. respecting my decisions and thoughts and feelings. i feel it hon, really. =)

i admit, im not the easiest girl in the planet to please. and i know im a world different from any other that uve dated. but im glad u're use to it now. LOLS! =) and ure willing to accept me for who i am without much complaints( i know u occasionally do). thank you baby. for loving me as a whole and for loving me consistently, making sure i feel your love all the time even though mine's anythign but consistent. =D but i guess tats just me.

thank you baby. i hope this relationship stays true. no lies. k? :)

i guess i just wanted to say

"Honey, You've been great! i love you! <3"

ps. me appreciating your efforts now doesnt mean you can slack off from your duties as my bf okay. LOLS.

volley @ clementi

2010-05-12T01:12:00.000+08:00

yea, it was great. i dont deny that it feels just so good to be playing at a place once so goddamn familiar. we used to spend almost all afternoon and night there. :) girls trg, then we'd stay back till late to play our own game with the coach and all. on other days we'd play with uncle and aunties. =) i like it.

all the familiar faces. Charlene and Xinthia was there also. =D Kokchang also came. there was also mingfa and wilson and wei tat. Tony was there.

yanqi totally fly my kite.. she fell asleep and didn wake up till it was 10pm. -_- like i always say to her, if i needed her help. by the time she comes to my rescue, i would have passed away. LOLS. =)

it feels damn good, jeh and jun were with me. =)

but jun left earlier cos she was working at 11. then i didn have much energy left to play. so sat there and iphone games. =D

i had fun. tomorrow shld be better. it shld have been a lot better had i not been suffering from headache.

ps. did anyone realise that this days, the weathers been getting a lot worst? :(

i want to READ.

2010-05-10T10:40:00.000+08:00

yup, ive stopped reading for more than a year! like, i definitely did not read ever since nicko. also, i couldnt possibly be reading when i was down and out over my exbeau. so, that sums it up. its close to a year la i think.

last wednesday went to lot1 with aunty kathie for pepper lunch. lot 1 because she wanted to return books she borrowed from Sans. thats also the day we went to PPF to view the dogs. ohhh, i realised i didntt blog on that. maybe later..

anyway, i borrowed two books by Jayne Ann Krentz. one of my favourite author. seriously, i cannot even remember the name of the authors that i used to love! i only remembered 3.

David Eddings for his Fantasy. Judith Macnaught for her historical romance. and Mary Balough for her historical romance also.

i remembered jayne through the familiar arrangements of the books and shelves in sans lot1. LOLS!

by yesterday i've finished both books. i want MORE. =((

needa go all the way to lot1. i need to start brushing up my english already. havent been speaking much proper english. while working its always mandarin. while vballing, needless to say.. mandarin also. school, depends on who. gfs.. jeh and all def speak mandarin. its only thru nicko and renny.

but when i talk to nick, its always broken english. LOLS! =))

sigh. i should read up more. i should try reading the news paper EVERYDAY. but its jus too damn boring.

twitter

2010-05-10T10:32:00.000+08:00

just opened a twitter acct. seriously, im not even sure how it works.

yeah yeah. tiffany's a late boomer. what ever. its not like i JUST heard abt twitter. i just didnt thought it necessary. but started one bcos of bestf. so, we'll prolly see how to goes. i doubt it'll work good for me, since im used to writing walls and walls and walls or words. twitter has a limit.

yup, thats that.

HAPPY BLATED BDAY MEIJUN! =)

2010-05-08T12:45:00.000+08:00

ah harrrr!

i remembered! =) whilst eating my bacon sandwich i was really cracking my brains. then i rememberd the crazy night at vivocity. =) we celebrated Bee kim's 24th with sushi tei. yummmm. just the 4 of us, like the good old times. =) <33

i love them thats for sure. =)

we later took a lot of pictures while slacking and smoking. after which. i cannot remember where apple go. but jun headed down to work. and i dropped jeh off at butter. =) homesweet home after that.

i missed this girls.

=))

STM

2010-05-08T12:33:00.000+08:00

yes, i think im suffering from it real bad.. i cannot remember what i did on Thursday! :(

OHHHHHH! i think i remember. i meet hon at around 4 and he got pissed. -_- cos i was doing my own stuff at home and taking my own sweet time to get my ass down to his place. oh well. but i always don get it with guys. why! they like us to be there when they're going to sleep! they dont seem to understand that theres nothing at all for us to do. i dun wan to sleep in the afternoon. i dont like sleeping at people's house! but i always fail to prove my stand. sigh!

so he sleep till like 6? then i dont remember what we did.. -_- it couldnt have been that bad right? else i would have blogged.. =\\

ahhhh! FUCK LA.

kbye

*whistles weeee - weeeeeeettttt!

2010-05-05T10:01:00.000+08:00

Today i had my Customer Service ica 1. 8.30 - 9.30.

so its an hour paper. i SWEAR! it was easy as fiaking A B C! =D

finished it even before half an hour. but i wasnt allowed to go, till it reached half an hour. =)) kinda retarded if u ask me.. they ask questions like ..

1. What is the appropriate dressing for an interview?

2. What body language tells you that a person is confident?

3. what are the image destroyers for both men and woman?

and the answers are like conservative 2 pieces suits. navy colors. all this nonsense lah! =D

went home to slack and die till jeh came my place. and with some minor updates and zooooooom-ed off the IMH (yes, thats woodbridge if you dont know) to play ball. =)

had fun! yanqi and Peishan was there today. my qiu kan is slowly coming back. im grasping it slowly. i need more time i think.

but damn tiring! after the first exercise of fan kun ( diving and rolling), my legs are jelly already. it was hell. but i like~ LOLS.

home sweet home after that.

You're a HOT SHOT

2010-05-04T11:36:00.000+08:00

You have great taste and enjoy being able to treat yourself. You're ambitious and confident and you want it all- a brilliantly successful career, a fabulously varied social life and a happy home buzzing with energy and warmth. And why not? You have the drive and determination to achieve your goals as well as having lots of fun along the way. It's all about achieving the perfect life-work balance. Vacations are definitely a top priority and you love experiencing new destinations that offer the perfect combo of pampering and discovery.

You tend to display extrovert characteristics and thrive in big social settings. You have a passion for nature and animals and care deeply about environmental issues. You do what you can to promote awareness and do your bit for the planet. However hectic life seems, you always manage to find a window in your schedule for some quality downtime. You love the thrill of high adrenalin sport, the exhilaration that comes with mastering mind and body in an amazing way. But time off doesn't mean doing nothing. You like to stay active and blow out the cobwebs with plenty of fresh air. It's all part of your healthy lust for life.

"I enjoy being able to treat myself. I'm ambitious and confident and want it all - a brilliantly successful career, a fabulously varied social life and a happy home buzzing with energy and warmth."

Interesting personality quiz @ http://www.latimes.com/news/newsmatch/ by the LA times. Got this from renny's website. =D

a site to recommend.

2010-05-04T11:03:00.000+08:00

if you're bored and have nothing to do at all, try this.http://notdoppler.com/theimpossiblequiz2.phpits a quiz that has 100+ questions, and i swear you can be there for hours trying to figure this. because if you answered wrongly for maybe 3 times? it's game over. and start over from question one honey! =))im doing this now, here in school.not much to do though. =) enjoy babies.good for working your IQ.

school's a fkin bore

2010-05-04T10:55:00.000+08:00

so, so, so, sooo, sooooooooo

MOTHAFUCKING SICKENING.

Tomorrow im gonna have 1 ICA, which wouldnt be too difficult for me as it is Customer Service.

but nxt week im gonna have 3 fking ICA! - 2 project Mgmt ICA and 1 Customer Service ICA.

nabeh chao turban.

this is damn sick la. so sick! :(

note to self : when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.

movies i want to watch.

2010-05-03T13:53:00.000+08:00

yes, The Last Song. i was never a fan of love stories. but! i want to watch this only because it is written by Nicholas Sparks. :) and all the movies that was based on his books turns out ggggggreat! for instance, one that i have never forget even until now!:)) i watched this because bestf was recommending and recommending it. now its like one of my favs! =Dand the other! hon keeps urging me to watch..DAMN NICE! =) both of them. Notebook and Dear John. none of which i regret watching, i swear! =)and dear john's male lead, typical boyf any girl would want. =) at least, in that story he's purrrrrfect. :) and, channing tatum damn hot.. LOLS! hotter than the notebook guy, forgot his name! lols. =)) plus in dear john, the female lead also damnnnnn pretty. but im surprised she starred in Mean girls. she looked liek crap there...Channing Tatumdamn hot right? hot hot hot hot hot! =) body also damn nice. somemore he damn cute. ah haaaa! but too bad la, i heard he's gay. i heard. not sure though. google has got alot of pictures of him and girls tho. =DAmanda Seyfriedpretty. :)so i really wanna watch the last song! the only sick thing is it's miley cyrus of all the other actresses..! -_-cant wait! :)yes i am bored at school.and being random.im damn bored.

so awesomely fucked up.

2010-05-03T10:29:00.000+08:00

yea. the words that describe my monday morning. :\i slept early last night. therefore, waking up at 730 was as easy as ABC for me. got ready for school and everything. was just about running late, so i hitch dad's ride to the Mrt station. wait for dad in the car and once we've reached i happily wanted to rush down and out of dad's damn tall car, with my goddamned laptop on my laps.****BAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM!!!!goes the weasel..i looked down and saw my super sad laptop staring at me from the tarmac ground. hurried to pick it up before dad notice and flew away from the car. whilst working off, i noticed my lappy is pretty much gone already. 2 corners are badly dented and bulging, cracking and chipping. damn badd..! FUCK MY MONDAY LAH! -_- suay like no fucking tomorrow.nb!k bye.

untitled.

2010-05-02T09:29:00.000+08:00

- i don't know what to call this post. partially because i have no idea what i'm going to post, yet. :) hahaha.Anyhow, today's kinda messy. i have a lot of things to do on hand. and also, there are surprise events needed to be attended and! events postponed. which made my sunday a "one-of-a-kind-sian" sunday.its hon's dismount. so usually the earliest time he's able to make it out to meet me is around 9 at his area, 915 - 920 at my area. 8.30 is my appointment with the groomers at Bukit Timah for ashley's fur rescue. so the initial plan was me drive ash down to Bukit Timah and hon will meet me there at the groomers. den we will drive to his place with both cars.but but but but! his family wanted to celebrate Aunt HN's bday, EARLY on a SUNDAY morning. -_- yea yea, i know. so i wasnt really keen. 930am dimsum!? i am not an early riser nor am i a dimsum lover. so i really didnt want to go. wasnt keen, not even a bit. i was soooooo scared nic will get angry la. cos its his family and the least i could do was attend. -_- i was being really honest with him. i whined to him last night thru bbm when he's already asleep because i got to know about the dimsum breakfast before he did.next morning ( which is today!), he replied me saying i do not have to go if i really didn want to. so nice right!? =) my boyf so understanding.. haha! only because he planned fishing already. LOLS! -_- so instead of him driving down to meet me at the groomers, i went to fetch him. den reached the groomers at 9! and was scolded by the very nice aunty. LOLS. i like her, she's damn funny and damn nice. left ash there with the groomers and ate out at the bukit timah market hawker. yummms. normal food la.after that we head back to nic's place. and he left for fishing on his own with ib cos i decided i was really too tired.. and was spared of hiking and fishing! so slept in at his place. Viewing of Doris was cancelled because she was a little pms-ey. she didnt want to leave her cage and threatened to bite when her owner tries to carry her outta her cage. oh well. so i will be going down tomorrow evening. with honey bun! =):( owner say that theres on potential viewer who came ysd. but will come again with her own husky to see if they'd get along. sigh. im not holding high hopes anymore. :((dinner with nic's family again! tgt with aunt HN to LAVENDER. i was craving for it sooooo sooooooooooooooooo much. i finished my MEE and almost all of the soup. :)slacked at his place till 10plus before going home on my own. thats all for sunday! really boring sunday.

3rd day of school.

2010-05-01T10:09:00.000+08:00

not really the best of days in school, but one of the better ones? friday today, so lessons are like 1-4. yes, its A 3hr lesson. Tutorial style. Customer service. Not too bad. not too bad at all. quite interesting. partially because i knew 80% of what my teacher wanted to teach. like grooming. how to care for your hair nails face skin. what is considered appropriate for the corporate world. what kinda shoes socks clothes and colors.:\i stayed awake through the entire lesson. i did my best to give her my 100% attention. but i only managed like 80. good enough for me. considering i didnt even bring my laptop. :) overall, not too bad a day at school. \Trained to lot1 to tapao foodies for nicko and went on to his place. check up on ash and smokes and to my horror. Ash's fur is in a huge mess. its matting and all. so i decided to bring her to the groomers at bukit timah. but was encouraged to bring her back first thing in the morning on sunday. 8.30am.cb!but i'd do it for ash. i love her. =)watched Blind side with hon. it's a bit slow paced. other than that, i find the movie perfect. i love it. the storyline was great. i enjoyed every moment of it. and, i didnt know sandra bullock was so pretty. i always thought she was so so only. like typical hollywood face. HAHAHAHAHHA! =\okay! nights guysim working tomorrow. siansation.

HAPPY 19TH BRUDDER.

2010-04-29T11:13:00.000+08:00

ah haaaaaaa! shaun's officially 19. well, a quick update on my baby brother. well he's in RP studying IT. is single now because i think he ditched his xgf Doris, which is a GOOD thing. *thumbs up. no, he cant drive yet. but he's slowly getting there. he's passed his basic theory already. good for him, but uh! no good for me. because in no time, we'd both be fighting for the car.damns.Anyhow, its a thursday today! which means no school for me. but i stayed home the entire day. initially wanted to go do my nails. touch up. but was way too lazy. so stayed home till its time for dinner with the family.:)We ate out at Mandarin hotel. Tripe 3 buffet together with aunt kathie. :) had a great time there. the food was good. but variety wise, still lose to shangrila's the line. :(( had an awesome share of oysters. HAHAHA! told you ive been craving for it for way too long already! :) oysters, and steaks are the ultimate love. i had those plus chawamushi and sorts. i tried all their pastries also. :) i didnt stuff myself with food. dont get me wrong. im a fuzzy eater. so i only eat what i like. i didnt try those that dont appeal to me. so im fine. =D no worries. no worries.=)we then had a blast taking candid shots in the car whilst moms driving. me, aunty kathie and shaun that is. haahaa.okays so thats it. pictures, click to enjoy.

an eventful day.

2010-04-28T23:56:00.000+08:00

Hon's dismount today. therefore, we get to spend the entire day together since well, theres no school for me tomorrow. :) weeeheeee! Met hon early this morning. was already ready by 11? he came on up also to fetch our babies, Smokey and Ashley to the car. They're gonna be staying with him at his place for 3 days. because he's on dismount and tomorrow he's on half day as he will be plucking his Other wisdom tooth. so tomorrow he'll be on mc as well as friday. :) nice.after he fetched me and smks and ash. we went on down to fetch Ben. then back to BPP, to buy some stuff for his home-made baits. as you have already guessed, yes. we're going fishing, again. LOLS. its the same old spot that we're going. Met Nick chong at Bpp before heading to hon's place. there, they set up the reels, lines, bait, packing, and all the other preparations.Reached the spot at around 1plus 2 if my memory dont fail me. it's my third time there already. first time was REALLY REALLY BAD because we're not too sure WHERE it was. it was all jungle and more jungle. a terrain that scares me and reminds me of Pahang. Second time was at night and i was so well prepared with army's insect repellent that i felt at ease the entire night. third was today..weather was scorching hot. i forgot to apply repellent on my legs. i wasnt equipped with shoes. and half way though fishing, IT POURED ON US. it rained cows and chickens. we all got soaking wet. the trip back to the car was exhausting. had to do a sprint for the shelter that the trees can provide us from the lightning as there was an open field. the boys wanted to stay on longer, but i dont have a very good feeling bout it. the thunder and the lightning all just seemed TOO near. and so, we reached the car all dripping wet. :\Showered at hon's place and hit the town! weeeeeeeeeeee! :)mission was to get brother's last minute present. haha. we 190-ed there. because nick was quite tired to drive. and also, theres complains of the petrol's usage also. so we 190-ed. guess when's the last time nicko baby took a bus? well, his ezlink card is the uber old one. so, whatcha say?.. :))head to ion. ate at some Japanese restaurant. not too bad the food. 2pax less than 50. :) its the shop beside BK. Got bro a shirt at Woonderland. i like the design. 73 bucks. haha! im pretty damn sure he'll be wearing it tomorrow. he's usually liddat. i hope he likes it. Nick says its not bad. yes! mission accomplished. haha.got myself two tank from Breshka. basic tank tops. tried the white one, like the fitting. got 2, one in black. :) after that, nic was dying for a smk. so we went to puff and await fred and sarah's arrival. they came to pick us up. Once back at his place, nic died on the bed not too long after he finished Fb - gaming. so sarah and i was in his room talking. we people-watch on fb. showing each other the ugliest among ugliest of our friends. but dohs, those friends we either do not like, or don really treat as friends luh. -_-ended up in roars of laughter. she kept telling me to shut up and change the photos cos she couldnt stand it. :\\ LOLS! when she showed me her friend Gigantor, i kept laughin also la. cant take it. damn funny. and THEN! we saved one of the pictures, and edited it simply by putting a caption "Hi nico! i lub youxxxxxxx!"LOLS!and set it as nick's wallpaper.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! and he dont know a shit yet.i am so anticipating his reaction tomorrow.WAHAHHAHAHA.i enjoyed myself thoroughly today. every single moment i suppose.felt happy. felt loved. :)nights people.

i had 3 bad dreams

2010-04-27T23:38:00.000+08:00

Had my afternoon nap after watching some cheap flick dvd from mom's friend. was drowsy, i think partially because of my antibiotics. and yes, i've had a series of nightmares. SERIES.damned.if i hadnt mistaken, its 3 to be exact. 3 on the same day. continuously. after i wake. and go back to sleep. and wake after another. and fall back asleep. seriously, it's scaring me. somethings not quite right i feel.my first ~~dream~~ nap-mare was a really bloody car crash. with nick. in his maroon odyssey. He was taking a left turn.. i think we just got food or something. and, the environment and surroundings were unfamiliar to me. its not city like, rather, it was like county side kinda feel. we crashed at high speed after the turn. when he started accelerating. i think either he knocked and scaped guy from the entire side of his car, or we squashed the guy between another car on the same side, also scraping him throughout the entire length of the car.thats when i started screaming. again.. then he jammed brake and the car went skidding and spinning. crashing through alot of cars and also, a lot of people. the car stopped when it crashed into a building. a HOUSE to be exact. it was bloody. everything. everyone. fk im about to cry now la, while typing this. no one died i supposed, i didnt get to see anyone dead yet. i know that nic and i were both badly injured. and theres blood all over me. i didnt notice gashes or anything. but i looked out to see, a lot of injured people. people wailing baby's crying.. also all bloody and the entire environment was a huge mess. like tsunami just happened like that. and then i started crying and was awaken from my nightmare.this is the only dream that was so vivid. because i think that scared me the most..second one was about nick and some girl. its wasnt a jealous dream. but this was spooky. the girl was spooky. i cannot remember much of this. also, i cannot remember if it was nick or some other guy. third was.. okay, we all know that im a buddhist right? and im more of worshipping the thai gods side. my entire family is. and the thing is, buddhist do have those religious items, amulets and all. in all sorts of shapes and sizes and all sorts of different gods and all. well, i do have some baby amulets that i bring around with me all the time. to protect me and my belongings from harm. and i dreamt of them. i cannot really say its THEM. but im sure its either that, or ghost. i cannot really remember. it scares me..i told mom and dad only about the car crash dream. they told me to go to a temple to get blessing and pray. dad says he noticed that my spirits isnt really good. else i wnt be so suay. im never usually this suay. usually im quite lucky. almost all the time. plus, i was 100% fine last night. and this morning i had to go to the docs. plus i killed a cat. and have this kinda nightmares. aunty says i look pale and dull..which IS NOT GOOD LA.its got nothing to do with my skin.but, she meant it in a shadowed way.cb.im scared.and i really duwanna think about this.

categorization.

2010-04-27T21:58:00.000+08:00

I've decided..i always blog whatever comes to my mind. like whatever my mind has discovered and made me ponder about. together with things thats going on in my life. plus me being just me, tend to add on a lot of things once i set my fingers on the keyboard. resulting to super duper uber long posts. so i reckon, it would be better for me to categorize them, right? regardless of the dates.meaning, if today. a lot of things happened plus a lot of random stuff just came to my mind. i will no longer blog in all in one super duper uber long post. instead, i will do it one by one. one incident by one incident. a thought by a thought.much easier right? also much presentable for you all to be reading it.in short, im gonna be saving you from great gigantic walls of words. :)be appreciative.. haaa!the only down side, well.. i suffer short term memory loss. i have the memory of a goldfish. therefore, i might just forget what i wanna post, in between the chapters. LOLS! :)but anyway, thats final!

FML

2010-04-27T10:05:00.000+08:00

yeap, fuck my life.was kind of looking forward to my second day of school. partially because its only one lesson and i end at 12. BUT! i just have to wake up at 6am in the morning to the calling of my toilet bowl. and then, there it started.well, it seems i have urinary tract infection, AGAIN. mom and dad just reprimanded me AGAIN. for always not finishing my bloody antibiotics. -_- early in the morning.so now i am stuck at home with nothing to do. i shall go to the doc's in awhile. and then, prolly home pamper myself. starting with yet again, another face mask. do up my pedicures. and indulge in all the dvds that i have yet to watch, which are all piled up to a size of a mini mountain. so today shall be a Eat, Sleep and die day for me as nick's 24hrs duty. SIAN!which means i will be home all day la. why didnt this come on Thursday? when he will be on MC and we can both stay home and rot together infront of the tv very conveniently with a toilet in his room. SIGH! this is gonna be sick. im going to drive myself sick by staying home today. damn.anyhow, i have yet to post up tigger's picture. :) the previous photo of him was taken by Esther. poor her, she cried when i took him away. awwwww. dont worry! he's going to a good home, i promised. :)also, i went 313 ysd. wanted new shorts and long baggy tank dress. i guess Tie die is into fashion again, and I LOVE IT! always loved tie dyed clothes. even those i wear at home's tiedyed. =) uhhhh, only cos mom bought it from thailand la. and i figured its too cheap looking. LOLS so i wear them at home. LOLS! =)) tried on almost 10000000 pieces of clothes. until my hair was a big hairy mess, i didnt find anything that suits me. either, i didnt quite like the fitting or the sizing wasnt right. but mostly, it was the fitting. i dont get it! i know i can get a little fuzzy sometimes, but NOT GETTIN ANYTHING AT ALL, is FUCKED. :(but at least i got my SKII miracle essence, so i am happy. at least! :) Teppanyaki for dinner yesterday, on nic. HAHAHAHA. <3 thank you. it was HIS craving. =D not too bad. the only reason why im not always up for teppanyaki is, its tooooooo filling. and theres TOOOOOOO much veg in it. i hate it. -_- this few days ive been having a constant craving for pepper lunch. i think got gong tao. make me keep wanting to go back for it. HAHAHAHAHA. anyhow, the barely visible spots on my cheeks are really disappearing. i cannot entirely say that its because of my EL high performance whitening serum because! haha. i really DONT want pigmentation. so here, i shall state my skin care regime..NORMALLY.for the Day :Cleanse.Advance night repair serum(neutralize the free radicals, and helping my skin to cope with todays fked up environment)Idealist Serum (minimize pores, loosen binds of dead skin cells to skin, smoothen and even tones)Daywear( Cheap! but rich in anti oxident, which helps anti age)Moisture surge (boost moisture and act as a wrap to lock in moisture. from Clinique)Advance night Repair eye cremeSunblock (dohs! this is damn important.)Night is the same, just without the sunblock.NOW! because im damn ks, and vain and scared..cleanseadvance night repairEL whitening serumSKII whitening serumIdealistdaywearmoisture surgeadvance night repair eye.2 more steps.plus i just got my SKII miracle essence. so that will come before Advance night repair.LOLS..if i ask nic to do this, he'll die. i swear. LOLS! =)) kk i gotta move to the docs nw. shall post up tiggers picture in a while.

Tigger

2010-04-27T09:59:00.000+08:00

as promised. :)

distracted
nick was holding on to him, but i was distracting him i guess?

Tigger
beautifully striped tabby kitty.

petite
look how small he is!

KITTY AND ME!
i know i spoil the pic, but I DONT CARE.

day1.

2010-04-26T13:41:00.000+08:00

school's a real bore. really, 3 hour morning lesson almost killed me. not only i couldnt see because i rushed to school and left my specs at home. GG. i couldnt even concentrate on what the hell she's trying to teach. :\\language = ok ok only. but the pronounciations of words could make a 3 yr old laugh. Matters - MaddersHappen - HapperrnsActually - Actual-leeeUsually - Usual-leeegoddamn, theres more. and i duwanna talk about it. :(( school's damn bad. classmates pretty nerdy. thank god i have 8 of the old classmates w me. :)sigh! now its another lesson. the tutor's pretty good.i can blog and understand what she's saying. -yes, multi tasking. :)bahhhhhhhh! anyway, ive seen tigger yesterday. went to collect him from esther. brought tigger to farah. and tigger is ADORABLE. he's a darling. i played with him so much. nick drove the car, cos i duwanna drive. :) yay! he played with tigger also. but he say tigger, on a scale of 1 to 10, he's only 6. but he's 8 to me!!! damn fiaking cute.:) im very happy that farah's able to adopt him. and im happy he's able to have a good home. i hope im able to make it up for him by finding him farah and family. :)k i blog again later.

i'm sorry.

2010-04-25T00:31:00.000+08:00

i really really am.. i didnt mean it. i just wanted to shift my car from the 4th lot to the 2nd lot. it wasnt me who wanted it. i was instructed by mom and dad. i'm sorry. i didnt know you were sleeping right behind my tire and was between it and the curb.i didnt feel anything when i drove off. but once i got outta the car and this man asked me politely but i could see the accusation in his eyes Man: " miss, did you reverse your car just now?" me: "no, i just shifted my car.."Man: "uhh, you knock down the cat uh.."me (turns around) : "oooo fuck! you're kidding me.."what i saw.. cat, blood splattered, struggling, cat, lying there at my old lot, blood.what went on in my mind : "oh no, towel, vet, towel, vet.. towel.."i went running to dads car (who family was in there). and started trying to tell them that i knocked a cat down. and i was so lost. and i burst into tears.. and was shaking.. dad walked back to the cat. and i couldnt help it. i was practically sobbing. i really didnt know it was there. i really didnt know. usually cats siam when the car's engine comes on. Bbm-ed nick and told him all about it. and dad settled the cat's body part. they sent me to work straight. grab a puff. had some food. though not much went in and headed down to counter. nick called me just before i reached the cargo lift. i told him about it. and also, cried again. he panicked. it was so bad that i was practically babbling.. den i was shaking again. got off the phone, and calmed down. walk to counter.another blow, tess saw me crying. and i started sobbing again. i cried so much this morning till i felt numb. the entire day, i felt numb, tired and was in disbelief. like this is all a bad dream. no doubt the aftermath of the shock la.the cat has a kitten, and i was just playing with the both of them last night after parking my car. i dont know if it was like fate or whatever you people call it. as all knows, i'm more of a dog person. but i was the two of them beside my car right after i got off. so i played. and the kitten isnt afraid of me, but looked me in my eye. which was weird. because most kittens avoid humans, esp stray ones. and in my mind i was thinking "my, thats the most beautiful kitten i've ever seen. big eyes big ears. like a grimlin. so gotta tell bestie about it."and then, this morning, i had to talk to bestie. not about how beautiful a stray kitten ive seen, but about how i killed his mom. :(i came straight home to look for the baby. but i couldnt find it. nick also couldnt find it. i asked my neighbours who all loved cats. they told me about this family from the 10th storey. and they contacted them for me. theres no way i could keep the kitten, since dad is anything but a cat person. if not, i'd have adopt it myself. so the least i could do was find it a good home.i called maz and she told me her mom and her has frequent quarrels abt her keep bringing in stray kittens. but she told me farah wants one. i went to talk to farah and after some talk with her hubby, they're up for the kitty. :)its now at my neighbour(esther)'s house. she's an angel. she came down looking for the kitty once she knows the moms dead. she told me kitty had nightmares when he slept. and also, he didnt want to leave the place where mama died. my heart sank all the way to my feet when she said that. and yet, theres nothing i can do! :( but i can only hope for him to have a good home. i believe farah and fam will do just fine. =) heres a picture of this lucky boy.he's only 1 month old. i'm so sorry baby. i didnt know your mama was behind the car. i really couldnt see her. also, i really didnt feel anything. i really would have brought her to the vet if she could still make it. i really would want you to be at my place. but i couldnt. i am sorry. i really didnt mean to take everything you had away from you. but i hope, what i found for you, would be sufficient for you. :') be a good boy okay? i will retrieve him from my neighbour's in the morning tmr. and i shall prolly ask nick to help to look after him till he comes fetch me. den i will play with him a lil before sending it over to farah..

this unknown yet familiar feeling.

2010-04-24T01:10:00.000+08:00

yea, ever felt like this? just suddenly, feel really depressed. sometimes it just gets so bad that i cry myself to sleep. seriously, i am afraid for myself. nothing's wrong with me. nothing happened. nothing bad. im not tired. i am not sad over anything. but i dont know why i feel this overwhelming feeling of _______(whatever you call it..)it really just gets so bad. last night was a mild sense of sadness. but i was able to fall asleep. today, i was fine. running all the errands and everything. then, when nightfalls.. i'm feeling it again. just really really down. why? i dont understand this feeling. like somethings missing. but theres nothing!i've got a good and supportive family. a kick ass bestie who will never leave me to fend for myself. a group of girlfriends who would be there for me whenever i need someone.a good enough boyf. i have a brother who loves me and will be there to stand up for me though i am elder. a dad who will always try his best to give me everything thats good for me. a mom who would make me happy and bring me and treat me to all her packages. - i have people who love me.ive got my ass into poly, in which is something a lot of people would want. i've got almost everything! a big room the size of a master bedroom w a toilet. i've got a luxury watch a bag a wallet. top of the range phone. i pamper myself with facial, manicures and hair treatments. - i have enough things to be happy abouti should be a lot happier than an average person.SO WHY AM I FEELING THIS?why.. i dont understand.. now i feel like crying.. whats wrong with me? its like i don feel at ease. but with WHAT. whats WRONG. am i missing something? :'( i do not know whats wrong.can someone tell me..please don tell me im suffering from depression. cos it leads to insanity. i don't want that.i don't know what to do now..

i want her ! :

2010-04-22T16:03:00.000+08:00

i doubt she's purebred. but if she is a purebred, then she's equivalent to midgets la. like humans, below average size.LOLS. i want her.

hideously hideous.

2010-04-22T15:44:00.000+08:00

the only words that i can use to describe me now. *throws hands up and surrenders.it was merely a DAY at the fishing pond. where i sat was definitely sheltered and i do not feel the hot hot hot sensation all over me. but still, ive gotten myself awfully wrong tannlines. LOLS! -_- ive got horrid slipper marks on my feet that looks like those u see on an army officer's uniform. awfully obvious rolex mark on my left wrist. sports bra tan lines on my back. and fabulously blackend face.gg.LOLS! YAH I AM NOT KIDDING.i just got tanned pretty bad. and i applied like 50spf Pa +++ on my entire face. arrrrrgh. now i am like slapping on whitening serums on my face every day and night. i can see those barely visible spots on my cheeks. and i seriously DUWAN THEM TO SHOW. i hate freckles. i duwan freckles, i duwan pigmentation and also, i duwan age spots! cb!LOLS. =)urrrrghh..second fishing trip, i got myself a 130spf pa+++. and slapped it on like free on my face. i swear! ive never used anything higher than 50. -_- and also, i caught sight of a CROCODILE. i swear! we threw rocks at it and it sank, and reappeared some 2 feet away. if it was a monitor lizard, it couldnt have swim that fast. seriously its kind of disturbing to know that there's crocs in singapore's water. ewwwww. it wasnt a big one. mmmm, somewhat 4 to 6 feet long. so i think its still a baby croc. but to have a baby croc, surely theres one bigger ones somewhere! :\\ ewwwwww.ohhhh! did i mentioned i saw mic at sch?! =)) ahahhaaa.

current life threat : SCHOOL.

2010-04-22T15:32:00.000+08:00

yeap, school. i am so dreading it. Monday would mark my first day (or second if you considered last monday's 2hr brief as 1st) of my 2nd year poly life. which also means - TEP. attachment at school. damns. i suppose i should be considered lucky. cos i fall into category C. which means, STUDY the 2 modules first, before starting out the actual attachments.so basically, my 1 week of school for the first 5 weeks, is only made up of like 3 days at school. yay! :) seriously i cant wait to get poly over and done with. and rid my parents off this awfully heavy burden; which is to be supporting me till im done with my studies.i figured, i am not going overseas to study anymore. why, you'd ask.. well, its not that i have changed my mindset about going overseas. i would love to! but thinking of mom and dad. they're really catching on age. i duwan them to be working their asses off just for we kids. apparently, my expenses are way higher than their own. so its not really fair. so if i were to go overseas, that would literally mean me dropping a financial gigantic rock the size of a temple on their shoulders. they'd not only not be able to retire earlier, they will have a longer time before they can retire and it will be all because of me. and also, ive screwed up my chances for scholarships by being a mess ( in fact, i was much more than a mess) when i just started school. sigh! so, after poly, i'd prolly study at the local SIM(suck cock school) and get it done with. so what i am saying is. ive dashed my own dream by being in an emotional turmoil when i had the chance. i couldnt prioritize and of cos, couldnt control my mind and heart. duhs, almost everyone knows how deep down to the dumps i was. but now, even if i were to do very well, i still will not be able to catch up and match up to the standards required by the local U's. im not being very pessimistic. but im just laying out the facts out here, being practical and logical. but i will still work hard. and see, how things goes. overseas just seem like its too far a dream for me now. unless bro finishes his studies and is working. which is also pretty much impossible. -_-BAAAAAAAAAAAA! Later-in-life threat : after poly, NO WHERE TO GO.

recent random events

2010-04-17T22:01:00.000+08:00

1. i have tried fishing at Kyoto pay pond at pasir ris farmway. :) it was FUN! i had FUN! i caught 5 fishes to bring home to cook for dinner! =D and i seriously noe nuts about fishing and casting and all those things. im merely a noob, mind you. :) went there with nick's friend by the name of Ibrahim. who also happens to be Corinna Lip's prischool good friend. LOLS! small world.2. Went for chup's ORD-ing chalet yesterday. was kinda boring. cos its a chalet what. im the only girl there again. but i already know must of the boys thats there la. since there a couple of their section outings before the chalet. so it wasnt all that bad. :) we tried fishing again at the pasir ris park there in the middle of the night. where the bridge is. and below was a swarm. seriously, theres no other word than 'eerie' to describe the atmosphere there last night. hurrhurr. 3. smokes and ash are getting along really well that the two of them are starting to learn to hump each other. :) LOLS! and i recently spent 70bucks on them. for their supplement, powder bath, brush, food, hay, snack. and i dont really recall what else. :) and i love them!4. i just did my nails again today. i initially wanted a plain maybe red or dark brown. but alas! settled for bronze glits, AGAIN. -_- but im loving it also la. 5. Vele's playing the invitation cup tomorrow at clementi and i cant make it down. sian. but its okay. good lucks people. =) at least have fun. =D anyhow, my jersey number is 2. what the fuck. and it was the first number i listed on the 'f-ed up number list' then i came up with in my previous posts.6. school's reopening on the 19th. im starting TEP. thank god i have guowen who have almost the same everything with me. cos im quite lazy to be making new friends this days la. don feel like it. dohs, u all know i have moods to my friendliness. =D7. i have nothing else to add. good nights. =Doh! koi's cafe'sFresh milk tea, Cacao barry milk tea SUCK. i still like hazelnut. =((

how do we let go of someone whose already passed on?

2010-04-17T21:50:00.000+08:00

dohs, im not talking about my grandma la! i cried for tobey again yesterday. i try hard not to think of him too much. really, i just couldnt take it. i saw a sheltie (the short form of Shetland Sheepdog, Tobey's breed) named Jackie who was merely 8 months old abandoned and up for adoption at the spca.i wanted him. drove all the way down. i wanted him. played with him in the pitifully small kennel. i wanted him.i was biting back and fighting back tears already when i saw the dog. he resembles tobey way too much. so i told the spca staff i want the dog, and she promptly replied. "oh, he's taken. tomorrow the family's daughter will come down to have a look at him to cmf. and you're currently no.3."i went back into the kennel, and was really biting back tears. played until nick signal me its time to go. once i got back into the car.. after maybe 10 minutes drive, i couldnt hold it back anymore.. and muffled the words "he really reminds me of tobey.." then came the major outburst. i sobbed like mad.sigh! how will i ever get over this? :(

gaaaaahh!

2010-04-12T18:28:00.000+08:00

Yanqi informed me that my jersey number is 10. okay, so wtf? im starting to wonder what have i just got my ass into. and also, i wouldnt be able to attend this coming match on the 18th also. so how come so fast get jersey? oh well! *shruggs.thank god its 10 and not some weird number that i do not like.. for eg. 2, 4, 5, 6 ? plahhhh!anyway, have i mentioned that im not going to adopt shelly's g.retriever already as she has a solution alr? =D im so happy for her la. she gets to keep her dog! yays! and just if youre wondering whether i am feeling disappointed. well, answers yes and then again no. yes because i initially thought i will finally have a chance to look after a dog that falls into the 'big dog' category. no, because i was never a retriever lover. as in i love dogs, of cos i do. but its not a breed that would make me gaga over. :) but i still wanna adopt another. so ive been coming online and constantly checking up the pets forums and all. it saddens me so bad, i swear. dont mention mongrels, there are so many so many pure bred dogs there for adoption. mostly abandoned else, rescued. i do not understand why people do not do their research before buying a dog. or cat or any other animal. you can find even the most exclusive breeds, popular breeds like husky, golden retrievers and samoyed. wtf? and some just abandon their dogs once the dogs grow old. so damn poor thing okay. i can easily list top 5 excuse singaporeans give.1. i do not have time for my dog due to busy working schedule. 2. my family has allergy reaction after the dog came.3. my son is asthma and my dog fur triggers his asthma.4. we're moving and unable to bring our canine along.5. we are migrating. and could not bring our beloved dog along. looking for a loving family. i really love my dog.seriously slap yourself please.if you know you're gonna be working then why get the dog? cos they're damn adorable when young. you mean only when your dog arrive at your place stay for two months then you and your family know that you guys have this kinda allergy? dont tell me the dog caused your son to suffer asthma. cos surely you would know that your son ALREADY has asthma, then why get the poor dog and then decide to give it up? why when u move you cant bring your dog? space constriction? for what i know, as long as they get enough exercise, it should be fine. or are you just afraid that they destroy your new furnitures? and if you really really love your dog, you would spend that amount of money to bring it over. you will find means and ways to get it across shores.see, its all just humans. and then the poor animal suffers. to you, he might just be a goddamn dog. but to him, you are everything.thats why whisky is still at our place. chewing on our furnitures. peeing on the papers and the wall together. so hyper that we cant catch up to his energy level but he still holds a place in our heart. but im considering adopting another instead of buying one more. needless to buy one anyway. since theres so many out there abandoned, waiting and wanting a home. compared to those pups you see in the pet shops, these dogs have so much lesser chance of having a new home and good family to look after them. so, if theres any one out there wanting to get a dog. please check the adoption centres first okays? :)anyway im currently at nicks place. nothing to do as he's as usual sleeping again. initially i wanted to go town to go shopping. but since its already 6, not much mood left. also, ive found a suitable dog that i wanna adopt. all thats on my mind is her. there is no adoption fee. but i might just give 100 or 2 to support these group of people who on their free time is trying to rescue and rehome dogs. i would do the same if i have my own place, but i do not. it would be nice tho. =)suddenly, i miss tobey. and i wanna cry. mms.. i miss having him to go joggin with me the most. also the sentosa trips. and the guilty look upon his face when he defecated in our toilets. ohhh tobey. i think i'll never find a dog like him already. and now i have whisky who is a world apart different from tobey.seriously i don even noe what we're gonna do later when nicks up. i dont feel like towning anymore. therefore i have no where to go in mind. sigh.tomorrow i am going to view the dog at east coast. damn far.. but i guess i'll drive down.k i dont noe what else to say.bye.

exhaustion.

2010-04-11T11:43:00.000+08:00

im all drained. and its just the beginning of a sunday. that would only means i have to go to work. sigh! i really am damn tired. maybe because i worked morning ysd and stayed up all the way till 2plus before i get to sleep again. and the goddamn best part was, i left my work shoes at nick's place. good going, girl.nowadays, i like to just be alone in the morning especially when i just wake up. i enjoy slacking and everything before actually going ahead with my other daily activities. it could just be coming online, not chatting with anyone, watching dvd alone in the living room. reading the papers. anything just as long as i am alone and i do not have to care about anyone. think about anything or talk about anything. i do not have to care of what people ard me feel and all. in short, i just move around with my eq switched off. and i like that. just as long as i am not disturbed. i actually enjoy that. and appreciate the time alone. i dont use to be like that and i do not know when this habit was cultivated also. apart from that, i actually get pretty frustrated when i dont get to have my usual alone time.for instance, i just told nick to get off the phone because i wanna slack and do my own stuff. i was getting a little impatient as to when he wanted to put down the phone. -_- when have i start being like this?and thats also the reason why i dont want to get ready to go causeway point to get new pair of shoes for work today. because, that would eat into my own personal time. in which i really dont want to sacrifice. anyway, its not worth sacrificing it just for goddamn shoes. -_- i rather let reprimanded or whatever for wearing the wrong shoes.sigh!anyhow, much was to be updated. recently went to mich's house for the first time in the years that ive known her. met her 1yr old retriever - Tara who greeted us by peeing almost all over. mmmms, after that we head on down to amk for KOI milktea. my first time, and it got me hooked! i love it. sweet talk can suck balls now. best part, you can order the big cup! =Dalso, ive been through Velement's training with peishan peifen and all. all's fine. i just need to train up alil bit more. because my endurance isnt really there. my ball sense i need to get it back in touch. everything! but anyway. i sweat like a horse. my entire shirt's back with drenched. my face with dripping wet. my arms and legs also. which is a FIRST.I recently redid my nails with no charge. because her workmanship for my previous set of nails were no up to standard. =D i did plain red and glitters this time. as i find it easier for me to get caught by my trainers for EL. =D cos from far, it just looks like red what. :)yesterday was work. and i was late for an hour because i overslept. i expected a blasting from tessie, but she wasnt really fuming. after work nic fetch me and we went to his place to change and wait for renny to pick us up. first time renny drove me out! =] went over to pets keepers, wanted to get a bigger cage for my longear-ed babies. but nic says wanted the 3ft ones. they only have 2.5 feet. i find it big enough alr. sickening. and its not even going to be at his place la. :\ sigh! but he's the one paying for it. so, no choice lo. if its me, i would have gotten the 2.5 ones, because i want them to be climbing up and down.after which, we went to angmokio.. because i craved again for KOI milk tea. LOLS! they're supposingly a TAIWAN bubble tea shop. so i was reading the menu, and i saw this "Cacao Barry - NEW". so i told renny, ehhh babe! whats this "ChaChaoo berry?" LOLS! she laughed like siao, i swear! then corrected me - "its Ka-Kao Berry la!" but she didnt noe whats that also. so when it reached our turn at the cashier. i asked whats that, i pointed to the menu.. and renny read "KAKAO BARRY", Cashier with a very puzzled face.. "ohhh! its cocoa berry". me and renny was like "huh!?" so in order to save our faces, i ordered that la. renny then say its weird huhs.. i replied " ithink its cocoa berry but they do not know how to spell la.."she looked up at the sign and we burst out laughing.. LOLS.sigh.. i go talk to nick first. update again.

wtf.

2010-04-09T15:36:00.000+08:00

yea man, for me, it goes like "WATTTA FAAARKKKKKK!"thats how ive been feeling this days la.it was like this the past few days.i feel like this again last night.and today, i initially wanted to blog about a hell lot of motherfucking things.but seriously, now momentum and moods spoiled.therefore, maybe i will blog tomorrow............. i just saw my phone.i seriously cant feel anymore sian than this.yea, extreme case alr. i am really so sick of all this bullshit.i sometimes really wish i was dumber, that way, makes everyone else so much happier.it just seem like, to have a mind of my own is a pain to others.arggghhhhhehhhh fuck la.i seriously feel like smashing my goddamn fone la.its just a really intense feeling of frustration.fuck my last off day la. half fucked. like being happy is too much to ask for.ccb.

annoyed

2010-04-05T22:54:00.000+08:00

Hello. i know most of you all might think this is my first post, but sadly, it isnt. there was supposed to be two more new post. one explaining why i changed from blogger to onsugar, the other was some casual updating. all of which is gobbled up by onsugar because there was an error whilst importing my old blog. every post i have from blogspot, became two on onsugar. so i deleted the old smokesandash and created a new one. so much for hassle free. haha.

okays, so reason for changing from good old blogger to onsugar is.. onsugar is so much more artisy compared to blogger. every tom dick and harry's wife is using blogspot. wordpress seemed way too formal and stale for my liking though i did try to change. xanga is the worst of them lot. livejournal, i only use it to do my online shopping. there, so in short, i find onsugar cooler than blogger and more unique. remember, changes are good! =D

so done with explaination, here comes my casual rantings.

Anyway, i've finally caught Clash of the Titans, just a few days to a week ago. i swear the movie was AWESOME! i bloody love it. :) if your someone who likes movies like this, fighting shows, shows that keeps on edge or if your someone who likes ancient greek mythology. then this movie would be a great hit for you, as it was for me. because im one of those who like ancient greek mythology. go watch!

Furthermore, the guy is absolutely hawt! the same guy from avatar, jus that this time round he's a lot hotter. dohs! because in this show he's masculine and not handicapped or wheelchair bound.

Caught the 3d version with nicko and his camp mates at iluma. 3d okay!? lols. but seriously i was abit sian to know that theyve gotten the tickets for 3d because i merely recovered from my servere migraine. it was so bad i had to take MC and rest plus see doctor. so the last thing i wanted was to trigger it, AGAIN. Anyway it didnt. :) but i feel that there isnt much difference from the 2d, maybe only the price of the tickets and of course, you have to wear the very heavy specs else you are unable to watch the movie. dohs.

First time there at iluma, nothing much there, no nice food, no great shopping. i dont get whats the deal. as with orchard central. sigh.

good show, must watch. =D

Anyhow, i've also watched How to Train Your Dragon, and i love it also! its damn cute. the dragon, called 'Toothless'. DAMN CUTE. but then if you're not a sucker for animation then please do not bother to watch la. it would be a pure waste of your time. i love animations. even cartoons. =)

the only animated movies that i do not quite fancy watching and regretted watching was..

Planet 51, which was sarah's idea. and we end up laughin like shit bout it. and also..

Wall - E with renny maria. in which half way through the movie, we were thinking 'ehh. don tell me this is a no dialogue film, i'll die.' LOLS :)

Also, ive caught Alice in Wonderland which is my favourite among the lot. C'mon, we all already know my ever so imginative imgination and randomness. of cos i love alice in wonderland the most. :) heee, i love the cartoon as well. i like the cheshire cat but i have no idea why it was blue in the movie.

watched this with nick and the poor boy was clearly dozing off on the movie. i think it's not really a guy kinda movie. but i appreciated him watching it with me because i enjoyed the show way too much. lols! thanks nick!

okays so movies and shows aside, ive been the resort world yesterday wth nick and family. nothing much i say. i wanted to go just to see whats all the talk about. only to find it not as grand as i had expected it to be. plus. i wanted to go to the victoria secrets. sadly i was soooo disappointed. i suppose it only carries the pink range and not the sexier lingerine. and renny says its 10x more expensive here than in United states. which is a big bummer. sighs.

didnt go to Universal studio. but we'll be going. maybe not with nick and all but maybe with jessie and jun and apple as jun has got the discount tickets. :) also because nick isnt someone whose keen in themeparks, unless i dare him. in which i do not see a need because thats childish la.i wanna go USS! =((

also, i cannot really recall wat else i wanted to post, but anyway.. this is all for the time being.

ohhhhh! i might be adopting michelle's retriever. due to some personal reasons she might nt be able to cope with tara, therefore i might be adopting tara. mom's ok with it. so yups, someone to keep whisky company also. someone more like tobey for which we can care for.. i miss tobey. sighs.

soon, my home will be like a zoo, and i love animals. if i have my own house, i will have lotsa dogs and a couple of cats. plus of cos my baby wabbits. LOLS!

k ciao

Post

2010-04-05T15:00:00.004+08:00

okay people, im officially shifting. :)

but no worries, i am not leaving my past here with blogger.

in fact, i shall bring my past with me. all the good times bad times.

everything!

well, you can all find me at www.smokesandash.onsugar.com

see ya when i see ya! =D

lots of love,

tiffany

2010-04-05T15:00:00.003+08:00

okay people, im officially shifting. :)

but no worries, i am not leaving my past here with blogger.

in fact, i shall bring my past with me. all the good times bad times.

everything!

well, you can all find me at

http://www.smokesandash.onsugar.com

see ya when i see ya! =D

lots of love,

tiffany

Post

2010-04-03T23:13:00.002+08:00

okay darlings,

i might be shifting.

im currently trying out this new blog site.

mmmms, so much for wanting to keep Bv's la.

but then, sigh!

people change like season change.

so things have to change also right

anyway i have always believe that changes are good.

so i shall be updating once the new site is up. =D

good night earthlings.

2010-04-03T23:13:00.001+08:00

okay darlings,

i might be shifting.

im currently trying out this new blog site.

mmmms, so much for wanting to keep Bv's la.

but then, sigh!

people change like season change.

so things have to change also right

anyway i have always believe that changes are good.

so i shall be updating once the new site is up. =D

good night earthlings.

Post

2010-03-30T11:17:00.002+08:00

awwww...

im just feeling so damn lazy to get ready for work.

:( i dont wanna go to work.

lols.

ARRRRRRRRRGH!

2010-03-30T11:17:00.001+08:00

awwww...

im just feeling so damn lazy to get ready for work.

:( i dont wanna go to work.

lols.

ARRRRRRRRRGH!

Post

2010-03-30T10:42:00.006+08:00

HELLO! =)

Bahhhhhh! i do not know what to be updating.
seriously nothing much going on.
only the fact that Tessie and the gang is currently in Genting.
for their incentive trip.

uhhh,
i have already hit my target 38K.
today and tomorrow is extra.

also, Yanqi called me to play with them for their team.
i told her i was damn rusty alr.
havent been training for sometime, thats one.
secondly i have been to shitty trainings that do not even benefit me.
dohs.

she kept asking me to go.
with peifen and peishan.
Mae also inside.
i told her i will try to go tomorrow.

training is 8 - 11.
love the timing.
but the next day im working morning.
GOOD GAME.
=\

LOLs
but nevertheless, im still quite hyped up whenever i think of vballing tomorrow.
im gonnna start off as shit la. dohs!
den if possible slowly train back.
that also depends on how good the coach is lor.
no idea who the coach is.
-_-

anyhow, finally did my nails ysd.
feel so much better.
for some unforeseen reasons,
my previous nails were breaking like siao.
i was getting way too upset with it.
thank god my appointment was first thing in the morning ysd.
=)

We also had an issue about ashley.
as you know, i've bought two rabbits.
known to be Netherland Dwarf rabbits.
and one of it, i paid extra to make sure it has good genes and is of show quality.
well, the thing is, she turned out to be long coated.

there shouldnt be long coated nd's out there.
i tried google it. no results.
so i panicked and called up the breeder.
she assured me that long coated Nd's occasionally pops out.

but other petshop owners and all ask me to do an exchange.
so i emailed Andra - Amercia Netherland Dwarf Rab Acc.
she replied me to the best news ever! =)

that even in pure bred NDs, 'fuzzy' nd's happen occasionally.
=) And gave me a site of one of their breeders who occasionally had Fuzzy's. =)

so, ASHLEY'S FOR KEEPERS.
maybe they're like humans?
=) only one out of the lot.

maybe she's a downsyndrome bunny?
LOLS, according to sarah, that is. =D

Other than that,
oh!!

Remember i used to say theres quite a bit of versions to golf?
i think i didnt mention it in my blog, but i did mention to others. =D
verbally.
so whatever~ They discontinue manufacturing one of the very top of the range one.
but now. recently, they just brought it back. =D

Golf R. =DD
170K. buy it.
=D

hahhahaa. cb.
Uncle ringo invited me to the VW event.
ask me to test drive the Golf R on F1 track.
SO TEMPTING. BUT I WORKING.
=(

so i missed it.
sigh! i would have MC-ed i swear.
but i was on the verge of hitting target.
so every day was crucial.
nbnbnbnb! =)

dont know if charmaine cussie went.
she's another vw fanatic.
haha
=D

anyhow! she's now doing nails at Joanne's also.
=D after i recommended her.
she comes by every 3 weeks from pasir ris.
damn far.
=D

uhhhhhs. Ohhhh!
called up vw.
well, we place our order along with 5K to buy red scirocco baby.
but uhhh. she's not here until now.
called VW up, and they say, we'll prolly get it in june.
NB!

JANUARY - JUNE.
= HALF A YEAR CAN.
fuck.

=(

anyway i gotta go now. here are some pictures for u all. =D

What i have on Currently:

The previous job.

Bling's for CNY

Smokes and Ash.

2010-03-30T10:42:00.005+08:00

What i have on Currently:

The previous job.

Bling's for CNY

Smokes and Ash.

I PASSED!

2010-03-25T13:18:00.003+08:00

HELLO!
it's 25th Mar 2010.
Results were released on 23th.
i got nick baby to check for me on 24th first thing in the morning because he was on the computer and also, i was too lazy to on my half-fucked lappie.

N I PASSSSEDDDDDD!
i seriously thought i've fucked stats up.
like seriously because i left the 20M question blank.
BUT FORTUNATELY, I STILL PASS! yayness!
and also my project was half fucked.
cb

but whatever, at least i passed.
=D
time for celebration.
LOLS
ya right. its only right to pass right? =D

goodbye stats, i dont have to see you ANYMORE! =)
i did better compared to last sem.
dohhhhh!

the previous sem was soooooo emotional and sad.
and i barely even scrape through my papers.
this time i got like 3 B's.

=)
im damn proud of myself ok.
cos i know i cmf cannot get A.
cos i do not do my daily assignments.
always hand in late projects and was never in teachers good books.
=)

but i got 3 B's. haaaaaa!
slack like shit still get B. =D
damn happy.

Int web- B
Microecons - B
Eff communication - B
Accts for assets - C
Principle of Management - C (this is the worst, i everyday late and 80% come for last 1hr of lesson)
and
Stats - D HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
=)

DIG THAT! =D
jengjengjeng
now all ready to go renny's grad show at Suntec.
weeeeeeeee!
=) nick's blackshotting im waiting for him to call.
sigh!

<3

I PASSED!

2010-03-25T13:18:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-03-21T21:45:00.004+08:00

HELLO! =)

let's count..
its been 23 days since my exams ended.
11 days since i last blogged.
and decades since my last party.
=)

Finally partaye last night with the usual girls.
Apple, Jun and Jeh.
of cos nic was there la. boyf always feeling insecure.
Anson - Nick's friend also was there. =)

And so it was work at 10-6.
makaned and homed.
got ready and cabbed to power to meet up the rest.

Powerhouse. Nic was really turned off by st james.
its just one of those cenabiang's clubs.
and, yes he was right.

well, its st james anyway.
cena biang's ever loved clubs wad.

anyhow we all had free entry in.
anson had friends there.
jun has membership card.
so ya all six of us were covered.

got two bottles of vodka cos its on promo.
and drank to our hearts content.
and then we girls, hit the dancefloor.
but before that, of cos we made sure we were high and all.
so we danced and drinked at the table.
till we're up, we headed for the dance floor.

UP UP UP the platform. and we strut our stuff.
=)

i like dancing.
oh and of course since its a cena biang club.
theres this group of girls who werent really happy when we upped the platforms.
we went higher than them. and danced.

she can stare all she wants and i just stare back,
her friend apologised cos she's drunk.
but i dont give a fuck. i just wanna have fun. she can stare all she wants.
im not stepping down.

because i know for one, being drunk isnt a good enough reason for your ill mannered behavior. two, if she was really drunk, fuck you think she can really dance on platform? seriously, she would have fell and died.
-_-

so i just stared and dance. leaving jeh jun n apple to dance near me.
if she were to bitch slap me, i'll punch her nose off.
=) hahaha. thats my intention but, things didnt work out as planned la.
damns.

i just kept staring when i feel her stare on me.
sick bitch.

=) danced with this unknown malay girl also.
we just wanna have fun.
haaaaa!

after that went back to the table, nic was drinking so much that he's half gone.
jun was way too high cos she didn have enuff sleep and drank too much.
apple was fine. i was fine. anson was fine. so we headed home.

=D

I DID HAD FUN.
but i hated the crowd.
the songs were good but not superb.

oh well.
pictures mostly taken with jeh's camera.
i want a new camera.
=.=

sigh!
LOLS
she'll load them on fb tmr.
and im off till 25!
juns off for 3 days.
nics off for 10days
and! jehs only off today.

LOLS! =)

anyhow, we were all so shagged we slept the whole day today.
apple me jun and jeh.
WAHAHAHAHHA! =)

left nic. he's still sleeping.
but he slept later than us.
cos he delivered my fried durian from jb for me.
yyuuuuuuummmmmmyyyyyyy
=)

i so love fried durian frm malaysia!
=)

and i wanna go universal studio la cb! =) AHAHAHHAa.
=]

i miss smokey and ashley.
both of which is in nick's house.
siannnnn

2010-03-21T21:45:00.003+08:00

Post

2010-03-10T11:18:00.003+08:00

ive been way too busy.
and no, i have not even party-ed once aft my exams.
damns.

=(
busy with?
WORK LA, WHAT ELSE?
back at RCP, once hit school holidays,
Ms Wong turns into a full fledge workaholic.
as much as i sometimes hate working.
SIGHS!

but if i dont work = no money = cnt buy the things i want = cut dwn on my WANTS = a very sad tiffany.
so, I RATHER WORK.
=D

maybe a change in environment is good.
sigh. our basic is a they-think-its-great $35 a day. + 2%commission.
SkII is $50basic + 2% commission.
Lancome is a $7/hr plus 2%commission.

What used to make Estee lauder a better company to work in is..
Because it was a bigger more prestige company, They actually have the welfare of the parttimers at heart. They give parttimers staff purchase. and they give out good prods at training. and we also have a share of the new launched products.

what made me wanna leave.
because their expectations are no longer realistic. what they only care about is figures against last year. like they give a shit about recession. they now wants us to track ALL THE THINGS WE DO. sampling. signature services. and seriously, when i saw the report, im starting to think, you really think fast paced taka will do so much signature service meh? -_- sampling also much track. nowadays, i HATE giving out samples.

the times taken for me to key all this rubbbbbish into the f-ing slow computer is good enough for me to serve 2 customers. and i don understand why people need to feign SS tracking. every counter is doing it. so why bother.

i want to leave, because im sick and tired of all these. so what if you're prestige, but on the inside, we all know whats going on. its not so much of the politics that i cant stand, it is just the inflexibility.

SIGHS

anyhow, amy resigned. Celeste is now a part time and is transferred to RC. Yinghui's out alr. Danielle's last day is on the 15th. so i wonder how many more girls to go, till you see what's wrong.

sian la.
work at 2.
=\

anyway, we've got smokes a mate. she's Ashley.
and she looks like a persian cat. =) theyre both at my place.
im tired.

2010-03-10T11:18:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-03-01T01:13:00.003+08:00

HAVE I INTRODUCED SMOKEY HERE ON BV'S?
Guess i havent.

okays guys,
This is Smokey. :)
He's a 4.5 weeks Vienna marked light chinchilla netherland Dwarf baby rabbit.
=) he's damn cute.
currently he's beside me, beside my french toast, eating his hay. =)
also. he's semi paper / litter trained.
=)

he wun pee anyhow on my table or in my room.
unlike me dumb ass dog. seriously.
=)

im gettin another wabbit.
this time a pedigree, so more expensive.
plus its a rarer color than smokez. =D
its like the wabbit craze now.
dad didnt even say anything =D

=))
Charmaine, clare and all my other cousins fell in love with it.
haha. =D its so tiny he sits comfortable in my palm la.
so he currently goes wherever i go.
he's damn tame. dont bite.
when u carry he will try get use to u and let u carry and stroke. =D

I LOVE SMOKEZ.

2010-03-01T01:13:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-02-22T20:17:00.003+08:00

HELLO!
i am half way through with my MFing exams and,
im still surviving.

:)
anyways, i have finally FINALLY..
been to ben's new place.
after all, it took him so long to get the approval for buyin that piece of land.
Which he den built a house.

and i say,
it's BEEEEEEEEEEEEAUTIFUL.
=D

with a mini pool and fountain?
in house home theater system and room with individual plush seats?
huge living room, eating room and kitchen
and hotel style toilets.

seriously, whats not to like about his place?
if one day i were to fall out with my parents
and ran away from home,
Ricky is so going to be the first one i call.
LOL!
=D

it was great to meet up with them.
joyce kang - still the same. like to wear boyish clothes with girly accessories.
corinna- still her, rugged casual.
ryan - still the same. fei gui.
ricky. - still gay.

LOLS!
short of alerick.
poor him got duty last minute. awwwwwww~

on the same day, later in the evening, it was apple's house.
=D yayyyyy! loves it loves it.

it was a long day. morning i went to east coast to do my lashes somemore.
almost the entire day out.
=D

the next day was aunty specs. den also the day i pia my studies till i almost killed all my brain juice.

then it is TODAY!
econ's paper.
seriously, it was FUCKED UP!
but its over.
i dont care, duwanna cry over spilled milk.

=D

so i drove down to get my facial done.
WHAHAHAHAHAHHAA =]
disappointed i didnt get to do massage as they were fully booked.
sian.

NOW MY FACE IS GLOWING.
yays! =D LOLS.

2010-02-22T20:17:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-02-19T09:40:00.003+08:00

its 940, and i am blogging now.
exam's at 4pm.
am waiting for nick, to go eat then go study
then to school.
if you wanna go like "wtf? still waste time blog and all"
stfu please.

i need to unwind, and i dont need permission to do so.
lifes a bitch.
cny's great, dont get me wrong.

theres the joy of cos, like cny, seeing the family.
all the pretty people. =) i like that.
when all come together, dress up just for dinner.
yeah.

and then theres tasha's hammy's baby.
=D which was1 day old when i first met it.
hairless and pinky.
squirmish. =D LOLS.

other than all this, its just not enough time to study for exams.
pia like siao and get agitated over nothing.
frustration.
krabi trip unable to make it cos leon cnnot take leave.

Sara and fred planned on hota kinabalu, but momkins not too keen.
say frequent bombing.

so most prolly i suppose we're going to tioman.
or something along that line? =D
it'll just be the beach, the sun and the sea.
great drinks and great people.

i need to be updated.
Jun's single again. and i am glad she aint crying. =))
damnn glad. oh well!
their far too different i tink?

but then, i dont quite understand.
why people think and assume that people from two different worlds cannot be tgt?
why must a pair be similar to be able to be tgt?
why?

where got such thing one?
i dont quite get it when guys say we're of two different worlds?
ok, stfu guys.
but seriously, think of a better excuse?

LOLS

cos i personally feel that 2 diff world's fine.
wunt it be boring if ur partner is almost exactly the same as you?
likes what you like. loves what you love.
then theres nothing much new going on is it?
nothing new. dont learn much. pretty much stagnant.

BORING~!

LOLS.
=) i dunno. thats just a random piece of mind.
haha. =D anyway, i've always always been random.
ysd i just dreamt nicko at jun's house.
den buy stationeries for her, and
i screamed 'NEVER BUY FOR ME!?!!'

TOLD NICKO BOUT IT.
he say i fRandom.
LOLS. =))

true that.

take me to places ive never been before. show me things ive never seen before.
great music. great people. great crowd. great drinks.
great fun. great laughter. i want this.
=) i duwanna go to the zoo anymore.
LOLS..

me being fickle again.
sigh

BRING ME.
to a club. with my girlfriends.
all dressed up. with our drinks.
ready to hit the dance floor.

I WANNA PART-AYE !
DAMN THE MFin EXAMS.

2010-02-19T09:40:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-02-13T02:12:00.003+08:00

we've already got the thai khrabi trip planned out.
the sick part was..

firstly..

Ren's gradshow fell on one of the dates in late mar.
she requested 17 18 19.
but nic's leave is 19-28mar.
so we settled for 20 - 23 - 4days.

den shelly cannot take leave on 20 n 21.
WTH?
LOLS good game.

so i talked to mich.
she was saying we could go on 22 23 24 25.
but rennys gradshows on 27.

-_____________-
this is damn hard,
if renny finds it too late for her show.
den i think we cant go all together now.
=\

which is kinda sian because i already set my mind on going.
and dads given me the green light.

he went like "When u gg? shldnt be a problem"
thank god! LOLS.
i suppose he have already forgotten the unfortunate event in thailand phuket 2 or 3 years back.
damn it was long! but the goddamn scar's still here man.
damn..

other than that. tomorrow shall be lunch at uncle fred's
den dinner with nic and family and his relatives all.
weeeeeee.
not a big fan leh.
of get togethers
sian!

i always look forward to them because its when you get to wear ur new clothes.
but i do not suppose we wear new clothes on the eve right?
=(
so, SIAN LA WHAT!?

anyways exams coming.
so yea. so far im doing ok with statistics.
yea man. tell me about being surprised?
i kinda like stats now.
LOLS
-_-
kill me please.

but then first paper is management.
den accounts and then econs..
and last STATS! =D

next sem will be TEP - Attachment at school.
seriously, i duwanna kenna cheers can?
pls pls pls pls pls.
damn!

anyway i am at nicks place now
and he is yet again, sleeping like a log.
i hate his mouse and keyboards.
mouse ultra sensitive and keyboard ultra spaced out!
as if made for people with fat fingers la i swear.
and its a pain with my long nails.

urgggggh
i havent got nick anything tho.
i guess we'll be belated la.
since he's mounting on vday.
and i'll prolly be out with my family to dunno go whose house to bai nian.
sian

and we all have to go like 'GONG XI FA CAI'
in our hearts deep down, its more like 'i had better not be seen or heard by any friends!'
cos it sounds so damn cena.
ooooo well!

anyway i suppose our generation is all jus saying 'happy cny'.
lols! =D

man i am so tired.
we caught Percy Jackson n the lightning thief.
damnnnnn good! i love it! =D

and had astons at the cathay and had billy bomber's cookies n cream milkshake.
ooooo, all these was ysd. =D

today was jus me going to raffles for eyelash touch up.
down to amk to meet nick and we had great carrot cakes!
den home to run.
after that i crave for kfc egg tarts and mos corn soup.
=DD

den we gamed till now.
booooms!

k bye! tmr long day

2010-02-13T02:12:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-02-10T22:18:00.003+08:00

Hello.
Today was another shit ass day.
why?

well, because i spent 16bucks on a one trip cab fare.
3 admin cards are with me - Gw's, his friend's and mine.
and we were supposed to have mgmt lecture at 11.

i couldnt reach school in time.
therefore hailed a cab from outside my block
and called royston once i reached Lentor..

he told me, theres no lesson today.
i called gw, he say how come u nv come morning 9-11 lesson but cab to sch at 11 sia?
GG.

tomorrow's morning lesson was brought forward to this morning.
and, i didnt know.
plus 11 oclock lesson's cancelled, and i didnt noe.
=\\

told the cab to u turn and send me home.
it came up to 16 bucks.
seriously, how many more times is this gonna continue happening? sheesh.

Ooooo anyway i just stayed home and read the book - Before i die.
cried like shit and got so tired i slept the entire day way.
LOLS. its a great book i feel.

oh well.
Yesterday was good.
when nic turn in to fetch me to town.
in the car, behind was a very crowded bunch of nsf men.
LOLS.
-Alvin, TQ, Chup, Daryl, ZH and GX.
all squeezed up at the back.

Ayam penyetted at Lucky.
drove back down to wilson to park.
went to Mandarin gallery to find his jeans but no size.
walked back to heeren's Queen couture to find out they jus sold his size.
In the end, he got one of the newer designs jus launched. so he's pretty pleased with it.
=D

anyway, while i was in queen's looking around right.
im quite surprised by the patrons there.
it used to be all the angkong siao people piercing people and usually all the english speaking altas people. usually, its the case.
im not discriminating or sterotyping anything.

but what i saw was.. even the bengs and lians now come to queens!?
and the first thing the abeng came in to look at was the Shelf containing nudies.
i went 'wtf? ahbeng wear nudies!? *jaw dropped*
LOLS!

since when ahbengs stopped topman-ed?
seriously man.. bengs are all upgrading. LOLS. i cant help laughing.
but the girl, was in future state. -_- so i guess, the lians are not upgrading YET.
LOLS

so ahbengs no longer wear caps that are too small for their heads and cheap jeans?
plus vneck shirts and show off their very ugly and unartistic angkongs?
one word.. - WOW!

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!
k , anyway! Vday is nearing and i am at wits end.
what do i get for him now? tell me tell me tell me?
mmms.. he's gonna crack his brains for me later durng duty.
because i told him i wun like it if he stuck to his idea of what he initially wanted to get for me.

WHY DONT HIS PEERS ALL MAKE THINGS EASY FOR EVERYONE.
AND JUS TELL WHOEVER WHAT THEY WUD LIKE FOR PRESENTS?

its so much more practical that way.
i really rather he tells me.
i dont like having to keep thinking.
gettin presents for people was never this hard because i never need to think.
it sometimes makes me duwanna get anything at all.

and vday is jus like any other ordinary day.
isnt it?

:'( and i used to hold vday was such high importance..
sighs.

2010-02-10T22:18:00.002+08:00

Post

2010-02-09T12:19:00.006+08:00

Hello all.
woke up way too late today.
say, 930?
the best part was, i only woke up to nic's call!

i guess i forgot to set the alarm ysd. damns.

Anyways! i woke up with damn nice skin today.=D
ysd collected 10 facemask + 2eye mask from Vivien.
Cny, Maine's gonna being me another box of 10. =D yayness!

decided to stay home to study for the coming exams.
chai gw and all were shocked to see me do stats la.
wtf.
=\

well, i really need to buck up.
if im aiming for a good life ahead.
=D

Anyhow i havent posted up the pictures taken with my fam at Dempsey.
and i wanted to show the pictures of dresses i bought! =D
so yeah.. will do them all up.=DD

All at a Thai German restaurant at Dempsey

the pictures of my clothes, uhhhh. some other day k?
=D